The New Boy
by MacabreObsession
Summary: Sora thinks he has the perfect relationship with Leon. When Riku moves in next door to Sora, things start to get complicated. Everyone Riku meets seems to get feelings for him, and even though he's straight, Sora can't help but start to fall for him. He outlines his honest diary, while also dealing with his crazy best friend Kairi and his parents' divorce. - SoraxRiku.
1. Chapter One

**Saturday, October 1st, 2011**

So I guess my mom got me this diary to help me deal with my feelings or whatever. She was all, 'You won't talk to me or your father about what's going on, and maybe you'll be able to talk to this.'

Except that if I was _talking_ to it, then I should probably be seeing a psychiatrist.

Whatever. As if it was news to me when they sat me down a couple of weeks ago to tell me they were getting a divorce. It's not like I hadn't seen it coming, they fight _all the time_. And I know I should be getting all angsty and moody and my grades should be suffering (like they could get any worse) but to be honest I think I'm taking it pretty well. There was an initial few moments of sadness that my family unit was officially falling apart, that jolt of shock that everything was going to change, but then I just shrugged and got on with my life.

Leon (that's my boyfriend) hasn't said much, but I know he's not happy. He's the kind of guy who strives for absolute perfection and dating a guy who's now coming from a broken home isn't exactly perfect. He pretty much _can't_ say anything though, because that would be insensitive, and insensitivity isn't perfect either.

My best friend Kairi (I know, shocker, the gay guy has a female best friend, alert the media) seems to be feeling it quite openly for all three of us though. She cried when I told her, she refuses to speak to either of my parents, and has actually stopped eating her school lunches (though I do still catch her taking a shot of Nerds at least once every class). It's like she's my sister and they're her parents too, or something.

Whatever. I'm not going to get too upset about the whole thing. Though I might pretend to, just to get extra good birthday presents next month.

**4:34 pm**

Dad just came by to pick up the last of his stuff. I do feel a little lonely now.

Might invite Kairi and Leon over.

**5:08 pm**

Ooh. A lorry just pulled up in front of the house next door to mine. It looks like a moving truck.

**5:10 pm**

It is a moving truck! Somebody is finally moving in next door!

**5:11 pm**

And they have a foosball table!

**Sunday, October 2nd, 2011**

Leon couldn't come over yesterday because he was teaching some kid piano (or was it violin?) but Kairi was here when that moving truck turned up and we hid in my room (which has a panoramic window that stretches across two walls, meaning we could see both the front yard and the side of their house perfectly) and watched all the action unfold.

Having never actually moved (though I suppose I'll have to move at least some of my stuff to Dad's new place at some point) I was unprepared for the sheer dullness of unpacking, though, as noted, I did get excited when I saw the foosball table.

Kairi was all, 'Let's go over and introduce ourselves,' and I was like, 'To who? Only the moving guys are here yet.' That made her pout and sulk until I offered to get her an ice-cream from the freezer, and when I got back I'd missed the most exciting part. She had her nose pressed up against the window and was squealing quietly, so I dropped the ice-cream on my desk and joined her, but I couldn't see anything.

'They just got here,' she whispered, like they could hear her through the double-plated glass, and I noticed that there was indeed a new vehicle on the street; a blue car. (I'm one of those people who, when you ask "what kind of car is it?" responds with the color.) 'I saw two adults and two kids. There's a boy and a girl,' she reported breathlessly, 'and oh my god Sora, the boy. The _boy_. He is the single most gorgeous creature I have ever clapped eyes on in my _whole life_.'

Except that Kairi, like me, is only sixteen, so that's not even very long.

'One of us will have to go out with him, or at least kiss him, because it would be a crime against the fates that brought him here not to.' Kairi likes to conveniently forget that I have a boyfriend because she hates Leon.

'Go for it,' I told her easily, sure that whatever Adonis had moved in next door couldn't measure up to my perfect boyfriend. The words were barely out of my mouth though when he reappeared through the front door and walked over to the moving truck, and started rummaging around inside it, looking for something.

It was like I'd been punched in the stomach. All the air flew out of my lungs; that's how good-looking he was. From my vantage point I could see his unruly mop of silver hair, obviously uncombed, his flawless bone structure (I think I could probably slit my wrists on his cheekbones, were I so inclined), his toned arms, and, I'm a little ashamed to say, his butt, which was waving about a little as he looked for whatever it was he was looking for.

'Mother of god and all his divine angels,' Kairi breathed beside me. 'He got better looking.'

At that exact moment, almost as if he'd heard her, the beautiful boy on the ground turned his piercing gaze in our direction, and zeroed right in on us. I gulped as Kairi threw herself to the floor – which did no good, seeing as it's a panoramic window and stretches from the ceiling to the floor – and the boy paused for a moment before grinning broadly and waving. I got my bearings and waved back, but couldn't manage to smile in response, I was still so shocked.

Having finally found what he was looking for, the boy turned and disappeared back into the house, and Kairi and I glanced at each other, expressionless.

'Dibs,' Kairi snapped after a few seconds and, even though I have Leon, I was still a little disappointed.

**1:10 pm**

Oh. Look at that. We've apparently invited the new family around for dinner.

Whatever. That's fine. I can handle dinner with a god.

WHAT THE HELL AM I GOING TO WEAR?


	2. Chapter Two

**11:45 pm**

I'm sitting in bed with my heart pounding. The Dawns' (our new neighbors) just left and my mom's all happy because they're lovely and Kairi is in the bathroom humming as she brushes her teeth because she's fallen in love with Riku.

Yeah. His name is Riku. What are the odds that a veritable Adonis would be named the weirdest name in creation?

But whatever. He's so attractive and cool that he somehow pulls it off.

Okay. I may as well start at the beginning.

Kairi came over in the afternoon because what else does she ever do with her life except bug me, and when my mom asked her timidly to stay for dinner, Kairi sniffed like she'd just found dog turd on her shoe and said, 'I suppose I could do that.' She was only acting like it was a chore because she's so pissed off at my parents about the divorce though; in actuality she was thrilled because I'd told her the Dawns' were coming around, and, as I mentioned, she has dibsed Riku.

'You're not to make him uncomfortable,' I warned her, as we got ready in my room. It was to be a sit-down, fancy dinner and I was to wear a shirt and actually iron my jeans. Kairi was wearing a sundress even though it's October and has already started raining incessantly.

Kairi blinked her big, round blue eyes at me. 'As if I would.'

'You are an outrageous flirt,' I reminded her unnecessarily.

'That doesn't make boys uncomfortable. Boys like when I flirt with them.' She paused. 'Well,' she added, with a smirk. 'Except for Leon.'

'You made Demyx Arpeggio cry last year.'

Kairi flushed bright red with anger. 'Demyx Arpeggio is a cad who doesn't know what he missed out on,' she retorted.

'He wee-ed himself a bit too.'

'I dodged a bullet with that one.'

'You tried to pin him to a tree and make him feel your boobs.'

'I'd just gotten my nipple pierced and I thought he'd be interested.'

'Please don't bring that up when they come over.'

'I didn't even bring it up now! You did!'

I stopped talking then because she was right.

The doorbell rang at eight sharp and we looked at each other briefly before darting across the room to my window and looking down to try and see them as they stood at the door. All four of them were beautiful, I could see from our vantage point. The boy and his sister had a similar bone structure, which was just as breath-taking on a girl as it was on a guy. Their dad had long silver hair and their mom has black hair and was petite.

'Sora! Kairi!' My mom was at the bottom of the stairs. 'The Dawns' are here!'

'That's my cue,' Kairi said, winking at me and pulling the front of her dress down a bit. I groaned internally and followed her downstairs, where my mom was just welcoming the new family into the front hall.

'Ah, here they are,' she said, turning to smile at us. 'This is my son Sora, and his best friend Kairi.'

'How lovely to meet you,' Mrs. Dawn said, offering a hand to each of us in turn.

'This is my husband Sephiroth, our son Riku, and our daughter Xion.'

'A pleasure,' Kairi said demurely, offing a hand to Riku and completely ignoring Namine. She doesn't really get on well with other girls.

'Nice to meet you,' I offered, shaking Xion's hand. She looked a bit older than Riku and completely bored at the idea of being here.

'Likewise,' she said flatly, implying that she felt no such thing.

'Why don't we all move into the sitting room and have some drinks?' my mom asked, gesturing to the door. 'Dinner will be ready shortly; we're having chicken casserole. Are there any vegetarians?'

Xion raised a hand lazily. 'I'm a vegan,' she said, clearly expecting to go hungry as a result, but my mom was prepared for that.

'Not to worry; Sora's boyfriend is a vegan. I can whip you up a tofu salad in no time. 'Wine?'

The adults got down to the serious business of getting drunk and trying to fix the world's problems while the four of us kids sat awkwardly at the other end of the sitting room near the TV. Kairi was batting her eyelashes at Riku and Xion was examining her nails.

'So,' Xion said eventually, surprisingly being the one to break the silence. 'What is there to like, do around here?'

Kairi and I glanced at each other. 'Nothing,' we said simultaneously.

'Are there any hot guys?' she asked, obviously hoping for a back-up plan.

'If there were,' Kairi volunteered, 'I wouldn't be here all weekend.'

'Cheers,' I muttered, rolling my eyes. 'There's going to be some school events happening over the next few weeks,' I added, to Riku and Xion. 'A festival and a dance.' It even sounded lame to me, and I usually have fun at these things.

'I like festivals,' Riku said thoughtfully. 'Will there be a big wheel?'

'Yes,' Kairi said, before I could answer.

'Oh good. I like those too.' He grinned broadly. There was something about those sparkly light blue eyes that made me feel like he was getting a joke the rest of us weren't. It was becoming clear that despite the physical similarities, he was the antithesis of his sister. Where she was bored and spoke in a monotone, he seemed to find everything just that little bit amusing. Like life was an entertainment. It was oddly… Attractive.

'Your mom said you have a boyfriend,' Xion mentioned. Her black hair was straight and fell to her neck-ear area. I bristled; prepared for a nasty comment. 'Where is he?'

The truth was that Leon hadn't even been invited to dinner. He's my boyfriend and I wouldn't trade him for the world, but he really doesn't make a good first impression. For some reason, I didn't want him to scare these people I didn't even know. 'He's busy,' I managed to blurt eventually, and Kairi snorted.

For the first time all night, a spark of interest flared in Paine's eyes. 'Go on,' she said to Kairi. 'Spill.'

'Leon's a knob,' Kairi said carelessly, without hesitation. 'He thinks he's god's gift to gay men and looks down on everyone.'

'He's sound charming,' Riku said softly, and his voice wasn't even sarcastic.

'He's misunderstood,' I countered feebly, knowing it sounded pathetic.

'He's a knob,' Kairi repeated.

'Dinner's ready!' my mom called from the kitchen door before I could reply, and dutifully we all traipsed into the dining room and sat at the table. Thankfully the conversation about Leon seemed to have ended with our reunion with the adults; new topics included Mr. Dawn's job (a successful lawyer), where they had moved from (Radiant Gardens), and eventually school.

'We looked around at most of the schools in the area and eventually decided on Destiny High,' Mrs. Dawn was saying.

Kairi nearly choked on her casserole in excitement. 'We go there!' she exclaimed once she'd managed to swallow.

'Oh wonderful,' Riku's mom smiled. 'You can look after these two until they settle in.'

'We don't need "looking after",' Xion muttered, spearing a tomato with her fork.

'I need looking after,' Riku countered, and I could swear he winked at me when he said it. 'I'm trouble.' He seemed perfectly happy with this summation of his character, and his parents smiled indulgently.

'Riku doesn't get along well with authority figures,' Mr. Dawn explained.

'The teachers at Destiny aren't so bad,' Kairi suggested. 'Right Sora?'

I shrugged. 'They're okay. But I mean, they're teachers. So you know… They suck.'

Riku snorted and covered it with a cough. I felt myself warming with happiness that I'd managed to make him laugh.

'Whatever,' Kairi retorted. 'You're just sour because Mr. Strife failed you in biology last week.'

'Don't tell Leon,' my mom quipped, who is remarkably laid back about my crap grades. I guess it might have something to do with the divorce, but to be honest both of my parents have always been pretty okay about my consistently bad results at school. I'm pretty lucky they seem to think my talents lie elsewhere, but if they know where that is, they're not telling me. 'He's a perfectionist,' she added, for the benefit of the guests. 'Nothing less than one hundred percent in anything is good enough.'

'Nothing wrong with a strong work ethic,' Mr. Dawn offered.

'They said that about slavery once,' Kairi said darkly, and Dexter laughed again.

'When do you start school?' my mom asked he and Xion, obviously trying to avoid a row, even though I was less than motivated to defend Gary for some reason.

'Tomorrow,' Xion mumbled, clearly unhappy about it.

'That's very soon after just moving,' my mom observed. 'Why don't you get a lift in with Sora and Kairi in the morning? They can show you around, make you feel at home.'


	3. Chapter Three

**Monday, October 3rd, 2011**

So school was decidedly… chaotic, today.

Kairi stayed over last night even though it was a school night and kept me up for hours waxing lyrical about Riku. I mean, I agreed with everything she had to say about him, but even that made me uncomfortable. He's beautiful, check. He's funny, check. He's mysterious, check. He's enticing, check.

But I have a boyfriend. A boyfriend who's very ethos on life is to be perfect. So if I have a supposedly perfect boyfriend, why am I so drawn to Riku? Who, let's face it, is obviously less than perfect. Aside from his Adonis-like good looks, which are flawless, he's a self-confessed trouble-maker. He has issues with authority figures (who I typically fear) and agrees that he needs "looking after" or he'll get into trouble. This, with my lamentable school record, is not something I should be craving to get involved with.

And yet, here I am, sitting in my room on a Monday night, daydreaming about the boy next door and writing about him in my diary. So. After about four hours of sleep and actually falling out of the bed in shock when my alarm went off, I was in an unequivocally bad mood by the time we traipsed out the car.

'I'll get Riku and Xion!' Kairi chirped, who somehow was managing to look as fresh as a daisy. I had deep purple circles under my eyes and looked even paler than usual. Possibly I resembled a recently-exhumed corpse, but I had been too frightened to look in the mirror to confirm this, so I can't say for certain.

I slid dejectedly into the driver's seat and slipped on my sunglasses, even though it was kind of a dull day. I could get away with it for as long as we were driving but I knew I'd have to take them off in school. I felt like I was horribly hung-over; I have no doubt that's how I looked as well.

A few moments later the other three appeared and Kairi got into the passenger seat, leaving the backseat for the Dawn siblings.

'Morning,' Xion said in her usual monotonous voice, and for once I was glad of the absence of emotion. I was in no fit state to be handling excitement (not that that was stopping Kairi, who was practically vibrating beside me).

'Morning,' I said back, my voice practically a croak. How was Kairi so cheerful? How was she so happy? I felt like death cooled down.

'You sound chipper,' Riku observed, and once again I felt like he was laughing internally at some joke I wasn't seeing.

'It's a Monday,' I said by way of explanation, and I caught his understanding look in the rear-view as I pulled away from the curb.

I had texted Leon the night before explaining that I'd meet him at school this morning instead of getting a lift with him like I usually did. I was as honest as possible, saying I had to drop in the new kids from next door, but I still felt like the worst kind of low when he replied that he understood and he was looking forward to seeing me. It occurred to me briefly that I was mostly looking forward to seeing Riku again, but I suppressed the thought and ignored it until it went away.

'So what classes are you guys taking?' Kairi asked, turning in her seat to look back at them.

Xion didn't even bother to reply, knowing the question wasn't aimed at her, but Riku smiled happily and said, 'I'm taking Math, Film Studies, French, and Dance.' He seemed completely unfazed by the fact that this was the most eclectic grouping of subjects possible and unlikely to take him in any particular university course direction. 'What about you guys?'

'I'm doing German, Geography, Philosophy, and Psychology,' Kairi said proudly. 'And Sora is doing Math, French, Physics, and Statistics.'

'Yikes,' Riku said, eyes wide. 'Why?'

I opened my mouth to answer, but as usual Kairi got there first. 'To try and impress Gary,' she sniggered. Then, considering, added, 'But you've got two classes together.'

'Oh, I doubt we'll be in the same classes,' Riku said gaily. 'I have terrible grades.'

Kairi snorted again. 'Then you'll definitely be in the same classes.' I rolled my eyes but didn't even bother to defend myself. It was true.

I pulled up at school a few minutes later and we all got out; Xion and Dexter pausing to gaze up at the large three-story red-brick building with trepidation.

'It's okay,' Kairi said softly, with a rare moment of empathy. 'We'll take good care of you.' Which sounded more ominous than anything, but they seemed to take some comfort in it and we all started towards the school.

'Do you need one of us to show you to the office?' I asked once we got inside the main front doors.

'Oh, yes please,' Riku said happily, rocking backwards and forwards on his heels. 'I'm desperate to register and get to my classes.' I gave him a dry, unamused look, even though I was, and was about to lead the way when an arm slid around my waist and I turned to look up into the handsome face of my boyfriend.

'Hello darling,' he said, and kissed me on the cheek. I burned red in embarrassment, even though only a week ago this sort of greeting would have made me weak at the knees.

'Uh, hi Leon,' I said, my gaze dropping to the floor. Leon is eighteen and in his final year here, two years older than the rest of us, except for Xion, who's seventeen. He has short-ish dark brown hair and is quite pale unlike me; he's taller and very thin.

'Hello,' Riku said loudly, without waiting to be introduced. 'I'm Riku.'

Leon, caught unawares, dragged his attention from me and looked Riku, perplexed. 'Hello,' he said uncertainly.

'I've heard things about you,' Riku said, not specifying whether they were good or bad.

'Um,' Leon stammered. He hates being put in situations like this; he likes to be in control. I knew already that he and Riku weren't going to get along, ever.

'Come on,' Kairi said, mercifully intervening before things could get any worse. 'I'll show you guys to the main office.'

'Goodbye Leon. It was nice to meet you,' Riku said formally, and then grinned at me before linking arms with his sister and following Kairi down the hall.

Leon turned back to me with raised eyebrows. 'The new boy?' he asked, and I could tell from his tone he was unimpressed.

'Yeah, and his sister, Xion.'

'Hm,' Leon said, pursing his lips. 'He's a bit odd.'

I felt an irrational flare of anger at his snap judgment; he hadn't even spoken to Riku for five minutes. I repressed the urge to defend him and said instead, 'He's not so bad.'

'Hm,' Leon said again. 'You have French first thing on Monday's right? Come on, I have Physics on the same floor. I'll walk you.' I do have French first thing on Mondays and, as my best friend predicted, so, it turns out, does Riku Dawn.

He walked into class fifteen minutes after it had started with a note from the main office explaining both his presence and his lateness, and Ms. Foudre directed him to a seat near mine. This isn't so surprising, as I obviously sit at the back.

'Hey, Sora,' Riku said at normal volume as he dropped his bag and sat down. I was regarded with some interest by the class's female contingent who, because they have eyes, immediately fell in lust with him.

'Um. Hi,' I said awkwardly. I don't deal well with attention but it was becoming clear that I was going to have to get over that if I was going to be friends with Riku. He clearly thrives on it.

Riku proceeded to obviously not pay attention to a single word Ms. Foudre said, occasionally turning around and asking me questions that weren't at all pertinent to the class topic. Such as, 'Do French kids really drink wine with their meals?' and 'When do we learn about French kissing?'

'Mr. Dawn,' Ms. Foudre said eventually, when she tired of his antics. She's a pretty laid back teacher and wouldn't have given a crap if he'd simply ignored her, but his every move was causing a stir and so she, understandably, intervened. There was a passage scribbled on the chalkboard in French which she had been trying to discuss with us for fifteen minutes. I didn't understand a word of it. 'Since you are clearly fluent, why don't you tell us what's on the board?'

Riku stood up and straightened his jacket, peering intently at the board for a few moments. Then, 'It's French, miss. I'm all but certain of it.' And sat back down again. The class started sniggering and Ms. Foudre shook her head at his gall, but even she couldn't deny it was funny.

'You'll get away with that today only, seeing as it's your first day,' she told him. 'But you'd better be more co-operative tomorrow.'

Kairi nearly fell off her seat at lunch when I told her, she laughed so hard. Riku merely sat there serenely with his sandwich, as if he were not the subject of great hilarity on the other side of the table. Leon sat right next to me looking disapproving but, thankfully, not saying anything.

'You're lucky you didn't get a detention,' Xion muttered, playing with her tofu burger.

'Lucky!' Riku scoffed. 'I shall have to try harder. I have a reputation to maintain.'

A group of guys walked past our table before his sister could reply and one of them grinned at her and said, 'Hey, Xion.' She turned a pale pink, which, for her, was the equivalent of turning bright crimson.

'Axel Chakram,' Kairi said appreciatively, nodding. 'Nice.'

Riku scowled. 'He seems like an asshole.'

Kairi laughed. 'That's just because you're her brother! Sora never likes the boys I date either.' This was so far from the truth it was the opposite. She never liked my boyfriends. I choked on my burger but didn't say anything. 'Do you like him?' Kairi addressed to Xion.

She shrugged. 'I don't know him.'

'He's not the best-looking guy in the world,' Kairi gaze flickered briefly to Riku, 'but he's still a hottie. And pretty decent too from what I hear. Do you guys have a class together?'

'Photography.'

Kairi grinned. 'Yeah, you arty people should stick together. Otherwise the rest of us would beat the crap out of you.' Kairi often says this to me too. She thinks I should be doing English and Creative Writing and that I should make friends with "other writers" except that I'm not a writer and would make even more of a fool out of myself in those classes than I do in the ones I already take.

About twenty minutes before lunch ended Leon stood up with his tray and beckoned me to follow him, even though I wasn't finished eating. Reluctantly I did, and we dumped our trays and left the canteen. He walked me to the nearest guys' bathroom and I followed him inside; then he dragged me into a stall, locked it, and pushed me up against the door so he could kiss me.

Normally, if any guy had done this, much less Leon, I would have cumed in my pants from excitement and lust, but today I wasn't feeling it.

I wonder why.

I tried to kiss back and not let on that something was bothering me, but of course he noticed. 'What's up with you?' he asked, moving to kiss my neck and slip his hands under my shirt; something that drives me crazy.

'Uh,' I said, scrambling around for an excuse. 'Big lunch. I don't feel too well.'

Leon pulled away and examined my face, looking concerned. He put a hand to my forehead, frowning. 'Well you don't have a temperature or anything,' he concluded. 'You'll probably be fine in a couple of hours. Do you want me to take you home?'

Any other day I would have jumped at the chance to have an impromptu half day, but something stopped me. I had math right after lunch. With Riku.

I don't know what it is about that boy. I barely know him, but somehow he's getting under my skin, into my brain.

I think I might be in trouble here.


	4. Chapter Four

**Tuesday, October 4th, 2011**

I was tempted to beg off school sick today in order to avoid any contact with the two boys in my life (not that Riku is necessarily in my life, aside from being a tentative new friend) but I knew my mom would catch me out if I lied. So I went, and avoided them both like the plague all day (except for in class, where Riku innocently sat by me in both French and Math, oblivious to the fact that I was trying to elude him) and even ate lunch in the bathroom, like some loser first former.

After school I tossed my keys at Kairi without a word of explanation and got the bus home, stupidly not realizing that she'd still have to drive back to my house to give me back my car. She and the Dawn siblings wandered into my house slightly perplexed, surprised to find me sitting on the couch watching TV.

'We thought you'd had a doctor's appointment in town or something,' Kairi said, frowning at me in confusion. 'What did you do, sprint home?'

'I got the bus,' I admitted reluctantly.

Kairi looked like she was about to question me further, but then she changed her mind and shook her head, letting it go. 'Whatever, weirdo. Have you got lemonade?' Without waiting for an answer she walked through to the kitchen and I could hear her rustling around in the fridge while Riku and Xion stood awkwardly in the doorway. I guess they weren't comfortable enough with the fledgling friendship to know whether to sit down or not. Conflicted, I just stared at them.

'Jeez,' Kairi muttered, reappearing in the doorway with a glass jug full of

Lemonade. 'Rude much?' She rolled her eyes. 'Come on, it's lovely outside, especially considering its October. Let's go sit on the grass.' Again not waiting for a reply, she grabbed the portable stereo from the dresser and told Xion to get some glasses from the cupboard as we all followed her outside like this was her house rather than mine. She flopped onto the grass happily and poured everyone some lemonade before turning on the stereo to some bubblegum pop station.

'Can we put on something heavier?' Xion asked long suffering after about twenty minutes of Miley and Justin.

Kairi looked heartbroken. She loves Miley and Justin. 'I like the Disney tweens,' she mumbled as she fiddled with the station buttons.

'My girlfriend likes them too,' Riku offered in what was clearly meant to be a supportive gesture. Two hearts broke simultaneously at his words. 'She likes that Hannah Montana show.'

Wordlessly, Kairi settled on the heaviest station she could find, which was playing Asking Alexandria.

'That's more like it,' Xion said appreciatively, but she was smirking. I think she knew we both had massive crushes on her brother. Not noticing, Xion just nodded. I think her mood had shifted so violently that even she was in the mood for Asking Alexandria at this point.

Discerning that he had done something wrong, but obviously not noticing what it was, Riku shifted uncomfortably beside me on the grass, leaning backwards and resting on the heels of his palms. I was doing likewise and his hand brushed off mine when he put it down. He didn't seem to notice, because he didn't move it, but my breath caught in my throat and I fought the urge to do something stupid like slip my hand into his. The burden of conversation fell on Xion, which was never a good thing, seeing as she doesn't particularly like to talk.

'So,' she said after a while. 'Axel Chakram asked me out today.'

Kairi choked, immediately cheered, if only marginally, by this news. 'What did you say?'

'I told him I don't date.'

Riku looked satisfied.

'Do you not like him or something?' Xion asked.

Xion shrugged. 'I do, I guess.'

'Then…' Kairi looked confused. 'Why did you turn him down?'

It was Xion's turn to look confused. 'If he likes me enough he'll ask again.'

Xion and I both raised our eyebrows. For somebody who seemed locked up in a pretty tight shell, that was a massive display of confidence.

'But… What if he doesn't ask you again?'

Xion continued to look perplexed at our bewilderment. 'Then he doesn't like me enough,' she explained, as though we had learning disabilities, 'and doesn't deserve me.' This was a compelling point. We looked at each other and frowned, both trying to comprehend it.

Kairi took a breath to say something else, then stopped and reconsidered, then took another. 'How many times did Leon ask you out?' she demanded, looking at me.

'Uh.' Embarrassing. 'He didn't.'

Xion blinked in confusion. 'Then how did it happen?'

'He just sort of… Told me when and where to meet him. And then he told me I was his boyfriend.'

Xion squinted as she mulled this over. '… No,' she said eventually. 'No. I don't think I'd like that.'

'How many times did you ask your girlfriend out?' Kairi demanded of Riku, which I thought was brave. I didn't even want to think about him having a girlfriend, much less talk about her.

'Three or four,' Riku admitted, and Xion snorted once before collapsing outright in laughter – which was surprising, seeing as it was, well, Xion.

'Okay,' she stuttered through her laughter. There were actually tears forming in her eyes. 'So get this. We're hanging out outside school one day, waiting for the bus, and this chick walks by. And dude – she is stunning. Totally gorgeous. She looks about our age but she doesn't go to our school, so we're all a little in awe of her. She sees 'Ku staring and gives him this little smile, so he waves, and she waves back. No big deal, right?

'Then the next day we see her again, because for some reason our bus driver has decided that being late is a cool new thing he'd like to do regularly. She passes again, and seeing as he's an arrogant douchebag, 'Ku goes up to her and just blatantly asks her out, without asking, like, her name or anything. She just gives him this weird look, stares at him for a second, and then walks away. The same thing happens every day for the rest of the week, and 'Ku is getting really confused, right, because she always seems really friendly before he tries to talk to her, and then she just ignores him.

'So he spends that whole weekend coming up with a really romantic way to ask her out. He has a big test on Monday, but he doesn't even study for it, just holes up in his room working on something.'

'Then Monday rolls around, he fails his test, and purposely misses the bus so he can see the girl again. As soon as she rounds the corner he starts fumbling in his bag for something, and pulls out this massive banner which he's designed, which says "Pretty Girl! Please go out with me!" and holds it up over his head like he's freaking John Cusack in Say Anything with the radio. She sees it and starts laughing, then walks over and…' Xion paused, obviously about to deliver the punch line to this hilarious anecdote, 'signs at him that she will. She's totally deaf! And she can't read lips. She had no idea what he was even saying to her all the other times he asked her out.'

Okay, so it's a totally adorable story. It just makes him seem even more amazing than he already seemed. Kairi looks totally overcome and has her "Awwww!" face on; sure enough she follows this expression up by verbalizing it.

'You didn't have to make me seem like such a massive idiot,' Riku interjected, rolling his eyes. 'She didn't seem like she was deaf. She just seemed like she was repulsed by me.'

'How could anybody be repulsed by you?' Kairi muttered, but luckily only I heard her.

'You were a massive idiot,' Xion countered. 'If I were Namine I wouldn't have gone out with you.'

'If you were Namine I wouldn't have asked,' Riku teased, and Xion made a face at him.

'So, like…' Kairi started, looking slightly uncomfortable. 'How did you guys… Talk?'

'I became very proficient at the art of note-writing,' Riku told her, grinning. 'And eventually I learned how to sign.'

'And she's still in Radiant Gardens?'

'She is. She's visiting this weekend though. You guys could meet her, if you like.'

Great.


	5. Chapter Five

**Wednesday, October 5th, 2011**

So as per the divorce agreement, I spend Wednesdays and weekends with my dad. I'd been hoping that this would mean I wouldn't have to spend this weekend hanging out with Riku and Namine, but before they left yesterday he and Xion made us agree to plans for hanging out and going to the cinema. When I got to my dad's place after school today I totally made it sound like we were going to be doing heroin in a back alley with some second-hand needles in the hope that he'd ban me from going, but he just smiled sort of sadly and said, 'It's nice that you're making new friends, Sora. I was worried, what with everything that's going on with your mom and me, that you might go into some sort of shell or have a breakdown, but you're handling it really well.' Then he gave me fifty munny so I could "have a nice time".

I mean, what is that about? I've heard about kids extorting money and gifts from their parents when divorce rolls around, but I didn't think it was true. Parents are idiots.

Anyway, it's not like I exactly need the money, since I have a job. I bought my car myself, for example, even if it is a bit shit. I work in a nursing home. You know, with old people. Most people think this is a bit disgusting, even Leon, since I have to feed them and wash them and sometimes even change them, and Leon hates old people because it reminds him that no matter how perfect you are in your life, eventually you will lose your senses and become incontinent. I kind of like that about them though because it means I don't have to feel bad about being so pathetically imperfect.

At least I can still wipe myself after the toilet. There's something to be said for that. I like old people. They are so interesting. Like one of the women I look after, Yuffie, used to live in a nudist colony. They make her wear clothes at the nursing home, obviously, which she hates, but she has her own little ways of rebelling. She likes to take off her shoes, hide them, and then demand of the nurses to know why they have taken her shoes. Once the nurses find the shoes and put them back on her, she repeats the process. I think it's funny, but only because I don't have to find the shoes. I don't know if it's a coincidence or if my parents planned it this way, but I happen to work on the same days as I live with my dad. I mentioned it to Kairi after they first told me, and suggested that my mom had tricked my dad into only having me on days when I'd barely be around. She snorted at this and said it was likely the opposite, that my dad had dibsed me on the days I'd barely be around, because I am so difficult to deal with. It is a good thing I am not sensitive or I might have believed her.

I start work at five on Wednesday, to allow for time to get home, change, eat, and do my homework. Yuffie was being particularly creative with her hiding places today; when I was serving up supper at half six I found one show in the vat of baked beans and all the meals had to be recalled and re-distributed once I'd made a new batch. The fun thing about old people playing tricks is that they can't get into trouble like if I'd done something like that at school.

They are adults, they have paid their dues to society, and also they're a bit nuts so you can't hold their idiosyncrasies against them. A small part of me is looking forward to being a troublesome pensioner.

When I got back to my dad's after work he was sitting in front of the TV in his with a beer in his hand, watching Wheel of Fortune re-runs. I'm not an expert, but I believe this is one of the signs of depression in adults, so I sat down next to him and changed the channel to the mid-week movie, which was Die Hard. He didn't make any outward signs of improvement, but I think it cheered him up a little. Even I like Die Hard.

Now I'm sitting in bed writing in my diary because apparently divorce turns you emo, and simultaneously instant messaging Kairi, who is very nervous about meeting Namine on Saturday. She seems have done a complete one-eighty and really wants to impress the girl, going so far as to look up basic signs online, like "hello" and "how are you?" even though Riku will be able to translate for us. I don't know if she's decided to be benevolent and accept this love rival into the group magnanimously, or if it's some sort of sneaky girl trick to lull the deaf chick into a false sense of security. I'm going to ask.

**10:30 pm**

I printed off our conversation because I can't be bothered to re-write the whole thing.

**KairiDoom**: You online?

**SoraIsGay**: When did you change my username to this?

**KairiDoom**: Yesterday.

**KairiDoom**: It's funny because it's true.

**SoraIsGay**: Sometimes it's like you hate me.

**KairiDoom**: I changed my username too.

**SoraIsGay**: I see that. I like how you've decided to become completely pathetically emo in the wake of Riku's revelation about his girlfriend.

**KairiDoom**: I'm not the one writing in my diary every night.

**SoraIsGay**: Touché.

**KairiDoom**: How's your first night at your Dad's new place going?

**SoraIsGay**: Okay. I mean. Nothing special. We watched Die Hard.

**KairiDoom**: At least it wasn't Wheel of Fortune re-runs. Casey's dad started watching those after his divorce and then he subsequently had a breakdown and bought a Ferrari.

**SoraIsGay**: Heh. Yeah. So what do you think about this weekend?

**KairiDoom**: I dunno… I hope she's nice. I mean, how are we supposed to tell if she can't talk to us?

**SoraIsGay**: She's deaf, not mute.

**KairiDoom**: Isn't it the same thing? Anyway, I've been looking up how to say things to her online, since she can't read lips. Sign language is haaaaard.

**SoraIsGay**: What are you trying to say?

**KairiDoom**: Just hello and stuff. Basic greetings.

**SoraIsGay**: Why though?

**KairiDoom**: Because I'm a nice person!

**SoraIsGay**: -_-"

**KairiDoom**: I am!

**SoraIsGay**: -_-'

**KairiDoom**: Whatever, ye of little faith.

**SoraIsGay**: I know you're lying. What girl trickery do you have up your sleeve?

**KairiDoom**: If I'm not prettier than her I need to have a better personality. And how much personality can you really have if you're deaf?

**SoraIsGay**: That right there is proof of your lovely personality.

**KairiDoom**: Shut up.

**SoraIsGay**: Seriously. I can't believe you said that.

**KairiDoom**: Why not? It's like you hardly know me sometimes.

**SoraIsGay**: Herpderp.

**KairiDoom**: Oh, go die in a hole!

**SoraIsGay**: I'm gonna print off this conversation and show it to Riku.

_**SoraIsGay**__ has gone offline._


	6. Chapter Six

**Saturday 8th October, 2011**

Okay, so today was totally awkward, and not even for the reasons you're probably thinking. Because it's depressing to think that posterity will never prosper from my ramblings and that this diary will perish and mold unloved in an attic covered in dust for all of eternity, however, I'm going to record the events of the day chronologically, and not just blurt out what happened.

Suck it, posterity!

So Kairi came over to my dad's with me yesterday after school to stay the night, and was totally unsympathetic to the fact that my dad is clearly suffering through some sort of mental breakdown. He was standing in the middle of the kitchen in his underwear half-baked muttering about goldfish and their complicated relationship with clams when we walked in, and barely acknowledged us aside from a brief salute.

Mortified, I ushered Kairi into my room where she sat on the bed and waxed lyrical about how it's his own fault and he and my mom shouldn't have broken up in the first place or he wouldn't be in this mess.

I ignored her and signed on to Facebook, where Riku started a Chat with me, which was thrilling. We talked about his girlfriend, who dulled the shine of my good mood a little, but it was still nice. I totally hid the screen of my laptop from Kairi though because, though I love her, she would have hijacked the conversation and I didn't want that. Then Xion came online and also started a Chat with me, and asked Kairi and I to come over this morning to hang out while she waited for Dexter to collect Olivia from the train station and bring her home.

This, though I didn't know it at the time, was the beginning of the end.

So Kairi and I arrived at the Dawn's place right as Riku was leaving and he gave us both this beatific smile that seemed to light up his front garden, and Kairi swooned but I caught her before anybody could notice and Riku into his car and drove away all happy and excited while our hearts simultaneously broke again.

Xion brought us up to her room and it was our first time seeing it, and it was so effortlessly cool that it momentarily relieved us of our depression. Xion sat blushing on the bed while Kairi and I cooed over her interior design. Two of the walls were black and two white, and on the black walls she'd clearly gone ape-shit crazy with some paint, flinging it at the walls with her bare hands. The white walls she'd covered with her posters, of bands she liked, and when she'd run out of space she'd moved to the ceiling, which was also half-covered in posters. Her double bed was black wrought iron, and around the headboard she'd strung white fairy lights.

'When did you even find the time to do all this?' Kairi asked eventually, dropping onto the bed beside Xion. 'You've only been here a week!'

'When I should have been doing my homework,' Xion admitted, grinning. 'The green paint is glow-in-the-dark; at night it looks like alien autopsy in here. I wonder what Axel Chakram would think about that,' she mused.

'You really are nuts, aren't you?'

'It's been suggested before.'

We hung out in her room talking and messing about for half an hour before we heard a car pull up outside. Unable to stop herself, Kairi jumped off the bed and raced to the window, peering outside to get her first look at the famous Namine.

'Ohmigod,' she breathed, after a second, and reluctantly I followed her to the window to see what she was ohmigodding about.

'That's usually people's reaction when they first see Namine,' Xion said cheerfully from the bed.

Getting out of the car in front of the house was a tiny, blonde-haired girl with elfin features and bright blue eyes that we could see from all the way up on the second floor. She looked incredibly delicate and classically pretty, and she smiled when Riku took her hand to lead her into the house, revealing straight, white, tiny teeth and a dimple in her left cheek.

'She looks fucking magical,' Kairi pointed out, shaking her head.

'People often say that too,' Xion said, grinning. I glanced from Xion to Kairi to my reflection in the mirror across the room as I heard Riku and Namine's footsteps on the stairs, and knew that the little pixie girl was going to undoubtedly be the most attractive person in the room in a few seconds. Xion is tall and thin with short silvery black hair and would normally be considered incredibly beautiful; Kairi is shorter with flaming hair and blue, limpid pools for eyes; I look like your stereotypical random boy. Usually I'd consider us all to be pretty good-looking. But we paled in comparison to the apparition now standing in the doorway beside a grinning Riku.

'Hey Nam,' Xion said and signed at the same time, jumping up to hug her and pull her into the room. 'This is Sora and Kairi; they live next door.' Namine twinkled her fingers at us and smiled; Kairi glanced at me and we both waved back awkwardly.

Namine turned to Riku and signed something; he turned to us and said, 'Namine likes your hair, Kairi.'

'Oh,' Kairi said, surprised. I think she was expecting somebody so beautiful to be a lightning bitch. 'Um. Thank you,' she said, looking at Namine, who smiled again. It was really no surprise that she and Riku had ended up together. They both looked ethereal, beautiful, and other-worldly; there weren't many of them in the world and of course they would gravitate towards one another. It seemed so inevitable that it makes the events of the day that followed even more unbelievable.

After the awkward introductions were out of the way we all sat on Xion's bed and got to know one another, which wasn't actually that difficult considering her deafness since both Xion and Riku could translate. After a while it became second nature and we barely noticed their hands moving a mile a minute to keep everyone up to speed on what everyone else was saying.

'Okay,' Riku said happily after a while, standing up and reaching for Namine's hand. My heart thumped in my chest as I thought they were leaving for some alone time or something (just because I liked her didn't mean it made it any easier that Riku was in love with her) but he grinned at us and said, 'let's go show Nam around town.'

Which was how I ended up driving the five of us around our soul-numbingly boring town which has nothing worth seeing except a pair of shoes somebody tied together and flung over a coconut tree twenty years ago which nobody has taken down yet.

'Why don't I drive us to Twilight Town?' I asked, naming the town near ours (and by "near" I mean thirty miles away) which is bigger and more fun. 'They've got Pride Lands this month.'

Pretty much everybody seemed receptive to this idea, so off we went, with Xion claiming control over the soundtrack to our road trip and playing heavy metal the whole way. Things started to go downhill at Pride Lands so you can understand why I feel slightly responsible for what was about to happen.

Xion, Kairi, Riku and I all wanted to go on The Drop. Kairi and I have loved The Drop since the first time we ever went to Pride Lands, as it gives the greatest adrenaline rush, and Xion seemed like the type to get off on being suspended forty meters in the air and then rushing towards the ground after an unspecified amount of waiting.

Riku seemed pretty into the idea as well, but Namine went super pale at the sight of the thing and shook her head vehemently. What followed was an obvious argument between the happy couple while the rest of us stood there awkwardly and Xion tried not to look at their hands in the equivalent of deaf eavesdropping and failed.

'Um, we could go up in twos,' Kairi suggested timidly. 'Sora and I first, and then Riku and Xion…' Her suggestion literally fell on deaf ears however as Namine and Riku continued to argue.

'Oh shit,' Xion muttered a few moments later, grabbing Kairi and I by the wrists and dragging us further away. She stopped in front of a cotton candy stall looking anxious.

'What?' Kairi asked, worried. 'What happened?'

'Well,' Xion said, obviously conflicted over whether to tell us or not. 'It seems like Namine just broke up with my brother.'


	7. Chapter Seven

**Sunday, 9th October, 2011**

Kairi gave a bark of nervous laughter. 'That's a joke right? You're joking?'

Xion looked her in the eyes and shook her head rapidly. 'Not even a little bit,' she said quietly.

'Can I help you?' the guy manning the candy floss stall was looking at us boredly, clearly over our conversation, which he'd been eavesdropping on.

'Uh,' I said, glancing over my shoulder at Riku and Namine. He was staring at her dumbly and she was signing at him rapidly, occasionally touching his arm with a desperate look on her face. It didn't look like it was going to be over any time soon. 'We'll take three,' I said. 'Thanks.'

He got to work and handed over the candy floss, his hand lingering over Kairi's for a minute as he smiled at her.

Kairi rolled her eyes. 'Oh please,' she said, looking him up and down meanly.

'You have got to be kidding.'

With which she turned and walked away from him, leaving Xion and I to shrug at the poor boy apologetically before following after her. He didn't seem so "poor" though; if anything he looked pretty pleased with her reaction and chased after me, slipping a piece of paper into my hand.

'My number,' he said, smirking. 'Give it to her?'

I shook my head in wonder but agreed. 'Fine. But I'm not promising anything, her heart currently belongs to that sex god over there.' I nodded in Riku's direction, who was still in a state of catatonic shock with Namine.

Candy floss boy look looked unfazed. 'I'm not worried,' he said arrogantly. 'That guy's gay.'

I choked on my own spit and he patted me on the back a little worriedly. 'He's not,' I said hoarsely.

'Yeah, but you wish, right?' he asked, smirking again.

'If you want me on-side for getting in my best friend's pants, I'd shut up right now if I were you,' I warned him.

'What's her name?'

'Kairi.'

'Aren't you going to ask me mine?'

'I don't care. And neither does she,' I added, turning and following after Kairi and Xion, who were examining a water gun stall with unnecessary intensity.

'What did he want?' Kairi snapped, glaring at me. I held up my hands in defense.

'Relax,' I said, 'I'm not after your Candy man. He wanted me to give you this.' I held out the slip of paper with his number on it.

Kairi looked at it uncertainly for a moment, and then turned back around without taking it.

'Shall I bin it?' I asked.

Kairi's face creased confusion as she battled some internal force, then sighed.

'No. Keep it for a while. But if he really likes me, he'll find me again.' She turned to Xion. 'Right?'

'Right,' Xion said definitively, folding her arms.

'You guys are categorically nuts,' a glum voice said from behind us, and we all whirled around to see Riku standing there looking depressed.

''Ku,' Xion said softly, wrapping her arms around him. He stood there and let her hug him, not hugging back but not pulling away either. 'Do you want to talk about it?'

'Maybe later,' he said, clearly having no intention of it.

'So um… What happens now? She's not going home till tomorrow, right?'

'Ku sighed. 'Sora,' he said, turning to me, and I nearly hugged him too, he looked so glum. 'Would it be okay if I stayed at yours tonight?'

'Uh, yeah, sure,' I said, tripping over myself to do anything I could to help him. I saw Kairi out of the corner of my eye start to get excited – she was supposed to be staying over last night as well – but I shot her a warning look and she quickly backed down, turning back to Xion.

'Girls' night,' she said. 'The three of us can bond.'

'Or you can just referee our boxing match,' Xion said darkly, and Kairi's eyes widened.

'Uh, I do have work this evening though,' I interrupted, looking at Riku. 'Will you be okay on your own?'

He paused, blinking at me. 'Could I come with you?'

I stared at him, and then nodded. 'Sure. Of course,' I said softly. I've never exactly been through a rough break-up, but I'm not an idiot, I know they're hard. Plus Leon has made me feel shit enough about myself from time to time to know how my fair shares about relationship troubles.

Which is how I ended up dropping a seething Xion, a nervous Kairi, and a penitent Namine off at the Dawn house, then continuing on to work, where Yuffie was being particularly mischievous and, I think, contributed to cheering Riku up a bit.

The nurses and assistants were really understanding about him being around and didn't say anything about him traipsing about after me silently. Then Yuffie tried to hide one of her shoes in the hood of his hoodie, freaking the crap out of him because he hadn't heard her sneaking up behind him, and he actually laughed and spent the rest of the evening following her around instead, fascinated by her tales of living in a nudist colony and deeply amused at her efforts of rebellion.

After work he sat in the passenger seat of my car as I drove us back to my Dad's apartment, and turned to look at me with a hangdog expression on his face, not even lifting his head as he did so. 'Sora?'

'Hm?' I asked, concentrating on the road.

'Will you come and live in a nudist colony with me?'

For the second time today I choked on my own spit. I covered it a lot better this time though, I don't think he even noticed. I glanced over at him with a raised eyebrow, and then returned my attention to the road, which was blurring. 'Only one person in this car has the body for a nudist colony,' I said dryly, hardly believing my daring.

'Let's start our own nudist colony.'

'There's only one problem with that. Actually, two.'

'Yeah?'

'Well firstly, public nudity is illegal and I don't want to go live in a forest. And secondly we'd have to let Kairi and Xion join too, and I don't like seeing girls naked. And I hope you don't want to see Xion naked.'

Riku wrinkled his nose. 'I don't want to see any girls naked ever again,' he muttered, turning to look out the window.

A few minutes later I pulled up outside my dad's apartment complex and led Riku up to third floor. My dad was in the bathroom, sloshing around in the bath, singing along to a Glee soundtrack. It seemed like he was in better spirits.

'Hi dad!' I shouted, fixing Riku and I drinks from the kitchen.

'Hi!' he shouted back.

'Riku's staying over tonight!'

'Does this mean you finally dumped Leon?'

'No!' I shouted back, mortified that my dad would bring up a break up at this critical moment.

Riku chuckled though, not taking it to heart. 'Does anybody like your boyfriend?'

I shrugged. 'I do. I guess. And he certainly does.'

'Yeah I got that vibe too.'

I led us to my bedroom and we sat down, me looking worriedly at Riku and him staring into the middle distance.

'She said she couldn't deal with a long-distance relationship,' he said numbly, and my heart broke. 'We were just arguing about the ride, which I wasn't worried about, because we always argue like that, and then we make up, and stuff. And then she blurted it out that she was planning on breaking up with me this weekend anyway as long as it seemed like I was happy here. As if having new friends and a lift to school means I don't need her anymore or something.'

I reached out tentatively and put my hand on his arm. 'How long were you together?'

'Four months,' he said glumly, and then looked up at me before I could hide my expression, and laughed. 'I know, I know. It's hardly any time really. And it's not like I'm in love with her. But, I was getting there.'

I paused for a second, and then wrapped my arms around him in a hug. He rested his arms over mine and rested his head on my shoulder, and I'm not sure how, but somehow we fell asleep that way.


	8. Chapter Eight

**Later on Sunday...**

My day has been a veritable rollercoaster of emotion.

So first, there was waking up in bed with Riku, which was initially shocking, then saddening when I remembered why we in bed together in the first place. Poor 'Ku. Had his heart ripped out by a magical mythical creature in public.

He told me everything she'd said at Pride Lands, and then I went to hug him and he rested his arms over mine and laid his head on my shoulder and I sort of rocked him from side to side for a while, saying nothing. Then his breathing evened out a bit and I realized he was getting really sleepy, and right on cue he said, 'Would it be okay if I went to bed now? I know it's early but I'm so tired.'

'Sure,' I said, a little awkwardly, because he still hadn't lifted his head or let go of my arms. 'Do you want me to sleep on the couch…?' I knew he was okay with the fact that I'm gay, obviously, but people can be weird about that stuff when it comes to sleeping arrangements. Understandably, in Riku's case, because you'd have to be both blind and impotent not to want to jump his bones.

This caused him to lift his head however. 'God, I didn't even think,' he said, berating himself. 'You take the bed, I'll take the couch. I'm being an idiot, sorry, of course Leon wouldn't want-'

'Leon can deal,' I interrupted; I didn't want him on my dad's lumpy second-hand couch after the day he'd had. 'I don't mind sharing as long as you're cool with it.'

His forehead creased in uncertainty; he was definitely only a few minutes away from Nod. 'Are you sure?'

'Yes,' I said firmly, scooting back in the bed and reaching out to turn off my lamp.

The room went dark and I crawled under the covers; I could see Riku's outline doing likewise at the other side of the bed, and I paused as I tried to figure out which way to face. Usually I face into the center of the bed, and I can't really sleep on my other side, but I didn't want it to be weird. I was about to lay down facing the window, when Riku, who was already asleep, grunted quietly and nudged back in the bed, his body close to mine. If I rolled over now I'd fall out of the bed. I pondered for a few more minutes before I heard Kairi's voice in my head, screaming at me to stop being such an idiot and just go with it. It wasn't like I was taking advantage of him. So I sighed and let my eyes flutter closed, breathing in his smell, which was sweet and spicy all at once.

And then when I woke up this morning, we were wrapped up in each other like a pretzel. It was awks (can't believe Kairi has me using that word, but w/e) since I woke up first and I wanted so bad in equal measures to both kiss him and not be in that situation at all. I knew he was close to waking up because his eyelids were fluttering a little, and his long dark lashes were brushing against those amazing cheekbones. His lips were all sleep-swollen and lovely and one of his hands was thrown across my chest while he was laying on one of mine which, I noticed was numb.

I felt like such a pervert just staring at him, and quickly closed my eyes again, pretending to be asleep, when I saw he was waking up.

'Hm... Oh, sorry…' he muttered, lifting his hand off my chest and wiping the sleep out of his eyes (I peeked). 'Looks like I practically pushed you out of bed,' he mumbled, tiredly, rolling over to his own side and off my arm.

'It's okay,' I said, flexing my arm to try and return some feeling to it, then flinching when pins and needles rushed in.

'What time is it?' he asked sleepily. I noted he was dopey in the mornings. It was adorable.

'Uh…' I reached for my phone and glanced at the screen. 'Ten in the morning.'

Riku groaned. 'I can't go home till she leaves,' he said, then looked at me apologetically. 'I can go hang out in the cinema or somewhere if you had plans though…'

I shook my head. Leon was supposed to be coming over but Riku was my friend and he needed me right now so that was my priority. 'You can stay here. We'll watch trashy TV and eat crap food, it'll be great.'

Which was how, three hours later, we were to be found in front of my dad's shitty TV, on the lumpy second-hand couch, watching old Monty Python films and eating our second tub of Ben and Jerry's Chocolate Fudge Brownie… Each.

'Girls just have the entire answers dude,' Riku said through a mouthful of ice cream. 'Ice cream is the answer. They have known this for generations and I always thought it was bullshit. But aside from the brain freeze, I feel much better!'

'You're OD-ing on serotonin,' I told him. 'All that chocolate and comedy.'

'I think I will just live on your couch and watch Monty Python and eat ice cream for the rest of my life.'

I laughed. 'Fine with me.' I got up to switch from The Holy Grail to The Life of Brian when there was a knock on the door and I glanced at Riku.

He shrugged. 'Don't ask me dude, I don't live here. Yet.'

This sent a thrill of excitement through me which I ignored, and got up to answer the door. Of course it was Leon. In the excitement of actually managing to cheer Riku up I'd forgotten to text him and tell him not to come over.

'Oh,' I said, deflating. 'Hey.'

'Hey,' he said, frowning, obviously picking up on my tone. 'Everything okay?'

'Uh, yeah, sure. Come in.' I stood back and he walked into the apartment. It was his first time being here, and I could tell immediately he didn't like it very much. He tries not to let his distaste show but I can always tell from the slight wrinkle of his nose, the way his mouth turns up a little at the corners.

'Where's your dad?' he asked. My dad has never been anything but polite to Leon, but I think people can always tell when somebody doesn't really like them. Sometimes I get the feeling that Leon doesn't really like me, but I know that has to be bullshit because why else would he go out with me?

'He's out,' I said. 'Not sure where.' Then, trying to make it sound like a treat that he would enjoy, 'Riku's here though!'

Leon glanced at me and then looked into the sitting room on reflex, where Riku was looking over the back of the couch at him. They wore matching expressions of dislike and I swallowed nervously.

'May I speak to you in private for a moment?' Leon asked me. I knew that tone and I was very tempted to say "no way in hell" but I didn't want to cause a scene, so I just shrugged and led him to my room, making an apologetic face at 'Ku as I closed the door.

'What's up?' I asked as breezily as I could, trying to make it sound like there was nothing for anybody to be worried about because, let's face it, there wasn't. Everybody needed to calm the fuck down, in my opinion.

'What's he doing here?' Leon demanded.

I raised an eyebrow. 'He's my friend,' I said flatly.

'I don't like him,' Leon said seriously. 'I don't think you should be friends with him.'

'I'll be friends with whoever I want,' I snapped, raising my voice slightly.

Leon sighed impatiently and waved my words away like they didn't matter. 'How long has he been here? Can't you tell him to leave? I thought we were going to spend the day together.'

I fidgeted awkwardly. 'I can't tell him to leave. He can't go home yet.'

Leon rolled his eyes. 'Why on earth not?'

'He's having some… Relationship troubles,' I said. 'So he's hanging out here for a while.'

'It's one o' clock in the afternoon, how much trouble can he have gotten into?'

'It happened yesterday. He stayed over last night.'

Leon stared at me as if I'd misplaced my senses. 'In your bed?'

'Of course in my bed. Does this apartment look big enough to have a spare room to you?'

'You let some strange boy sleep in your bed and you didn't even think to mention it to me?' Leon was shouting at this point and I was uncomfortably aware that Riku could probably hear everything on the other side of the door. And he wasn't the type to turn the TV up just to drown it out.

'He's not a "strange boy",' I retorted, offended. 'He's my friend! And since when do I ever ask you permission to do anything?'

'We are in a relationship, Sora!' Leon shouted. 'That means something. Did anything happen?'

I gaped at him, slack-jawed. 'Are you being serious?' I demanded after a moment.

'Perfectly!'

'You are seriously asking me if something happened with Riku?'

'Yes I am! And the fact that you won't answer the question is a little worrying!'

'No, nothing happened!' I shouted. 'I can't believe we're even having this conversation!'

'Oh, don't be so naïve, Sora. Do you really think I don't see how you look at him? Do you really think he wouldn't take advantage of that?'

'He's straight!'

'You just said yourself that he's having relationship troubles! Not to mention the way that he looks at you!'

'We don't look at each other any way! You're being paranoid!'

Leon laughed bitterly. 'Just because I'm being paranoid, doesn't mean I'm not right. You're being a total slut, Sora!'

I gaped at him again, rallying myself for a comeback, when the door opened and I turned to see Riku standing in the doorway, looking bored.

'Take that back,' he said mildly, directing it at Leon.

'This has nothing to do with you,' Leon said in his normal voice. 'It's none of your business.'

'It wasn't until you dragged me into it. I think you owe both of us an apology.'

I swallowed, glancing between Leon and Riku nervously. I was still really angry with Leon though, which, though I'm ashamed to admit it, put me firmly on Riku's side.

'Can you please call off your guard dog?' Leon asked me impatiently, gesturing to Riku.

'No,' I said stubbornly. 'I think you should apologize to us.'

Leon made a noise of impatience and moved towards the door. For one heart-stopping moment I thought he was going to do something stupid like try to hit Riku, but he simply moved past him into the sitting room and towards the door, saying, 'I'll speak to you tomorrow at school. Have sex with him for all I care.'

I followed him, pushing past Riku to shout, 'Fine! I will have sex with him! And you can't stop me!'

Leon slammed the door closed behind him and I gave a strangled noise of frustration, taking a few calming breaths before turning around to face Riku again.

'So…' he said conversationally. 'Shall we do the sex now then, or wait till later?'

'Ha, ha,' I said sarcastically, dropping onto the couch even though my entire body had reacted favorably to that suggestion. Riku came and sat beside me, and I noticed the movie was playing silently on the TV screen. 'Sorry you had to hear all that,' I mumbled. 'And sorry you got dragged into it.'

'That's okay,' Riku said breezily. 'It's nice to know I'm irresistible to both genders.'

I elbowed him. 'Shut up,' I muttered. 'I don't look at you any differently than I do anybody else. Just like you don't look at me any differently.'

Riku looked surprised. 'I do look at you differently,' he said, as though I should have known this. 'You're a really good friend, Sora. That's really important to me.' There was a pause as I tried not to blush and Riku pretended not to notice me trying not to blush, and he reached for the TV remote to turn the volume back up on Monty Python.

'Everybody's breaking up,' he commented monotonously.

And even though we spent the rest of the day like we'd spent the morning; watching TV and eating things to make us fat, I had to wonder if he was right, and whether Leon and I had just broken up or not.


	9. Chapter Nine

**Monday, 10th October, 2011**

Kairi all but had a shit-fit when I told her this morning what happened with Leon yesterday. I swung by the Dawn's first to pick up Xion and Riku – who had only returned home yesterday evening after his sister had assured him that the "evil shrew" as she and Kairi were now calling Namine had been safely deposited at the train station – and then went on to pick up Kairi for school.

Of course Riku had to leave it till Kairi got in the car to go, 'Oh, hey, man, I totally forgot, did you talk to Leon at all after yesterday?'

And I nearly banged my head off the steering wheel in frustration when Kairi's little ears twitched and she enquired, 'Why, what happened yesterday?'

So of course I had to tell her, because 'Ku was right there and would have known if I was lying, and Kairi all but hit the roof. 'That little turd-nugget!' she screamed, her face red with fury and her voice strangled. 'I'll kill him. I can't believe he said that to you! I can't believe he called you a slut! That paranoid, useless, waste-of-space, ungrateful bastard! He doesn't know how lucky he is to have you, Sora, but I swear to god I'll make him understand.' She glowered darkly, staring straight ahead at the road as she contemplated the violence she was planning to unleash on Leon.

'Sora you didn't even tell her the best bit,' Riku complained from behind me, and I glanced in the rear-view to see him looking impatient and Xion looking bemused. 'Tell her what you said at the very end! Go on.'

So of course I had to relay about Leon telling me to sleep with Riku and about me informing him that I would. I wasn't sure how Kairi would react to this, given that she's in love with him too, but luckily she started laughing.

'You didn't?' she demanded.

'I did.'

'Oh Sora. I knew you had a pair of testicles in there somewhere,' she fondly, while I burned red with mortification.

When we got to school 'Ku, Xion, and I all tumbled out of the car with the same reluctance we exhibited every Monday, but Kairi was rearing to go. Despite my admitting that I'd already given Leon a tongue-lashing (and not the good kind) she still seemed intent on beating the snot out of him (and believe me, she totally could. Leon's pretty tall, but he's reed thin and she'd snap him like a pretzel).

'Are you really going to beat him up?' Riku asked interestedly as we walked towards the entrance.

'Yes. Nobody hurts Sora and gets away with it.'

'Hmm,' Riku scratched his chin. 'I feel similarly. Would you be completely opposed to the idea of an accomplice?' Kairi turned to look at him with surprise, as; I may as well mention, did I.

'I think you defended me enough last night,' I muttered, trying to defuse the situation. Kairi by herself I could handle; if they teamed up, not so much.

'Can I come too?' Xion interjected. 'I probably won't fight him but I would like to watch.'

I glanced from one to the other like they were mad, then shook my head and walked away. I know they only had my best interests at heart, but I couldn't handle so much violence so early in the morning. Instead, I decided to track down my boyfriend/ex-boyfriend/whatever he was and warn him of the impending doom. I found him by his locker talking to one of his friends, Reno, whom I detest. Reno doesn't like me because I'm two years younger than him and therefore inconsequential; I don't like Reno because he is a complete fuck-nut.

'Hey,' I said quietly to Leon, causing them both to turn and look at me. Reno walked away without even greeting me, which I would have taken offence to if that wasn't how he treated me every day anyway.

'Hello,' Leon said stiffly. I saw his eyes scanning my body and I had to stop myself from slapping him; I couldn't believe it. He was actually checking to see if I was standing funny, if I was in pain – if I'd had sex with Riku, in other words.

I clenched my jaw and forced myself to be civil. 'Just thought I'd warn you that Kairi's out for blood; specifically yours. And before you even say anything about me being immature and telling our personal problems to my best friend, I have two things to say. One, shut the fuck up. And two, Riku made me. Goodbye.' With which I turned around and made my way to my first class, my heart beating erratically in my chest. If we hadn't been broken up before, I figured, we were definitely broken up now.

I got to French with only a few seconds to spare and slid into my seat near Riku before Ms. Founder got to class. 'Hey,' he said, turning around in his seat to look at me. 'Where'd you go?'

'Walkabout,' I settled for saying, knowing I'd get in trouble for warning Leon about their plan.

'You went to find Leon, didn't you?' I dropped my head on to my desk, and started in surprise when I heard Riku's voice right beside me. He'd gotten up and knelt down beside my desk. 'You know, it's okay to still want to be with him,' he said softly. 'I'm not exactly sure what you see in him, because it seems to me that no matter how hard he strives to be perfect, you're still better than him in every way. But we can't help loving who we love and if you tell me to leave him alone, I will.' He paused. 'Not sure I can say the same for Kairi, though.'

I looked at him helplessly, not for the first time wishing that somebody else could make the big decisions for me. 'I'm not really sure you want to be with him though,' he continued thoughtfully. 'I think you might just be scared not to be with him. Because, I know I don't know him very well, but I think that when you and Leon got together in the first place, he did his very best to make sure you felt like you couldn't live without him. I think he might have broken you a bit. But just a little bit, because you're still fighting him, and I think that's good.'

I stared him, barely registering that Ms. Founder had just walked into the room and was trying to call order. Was what he was saying true? It certainly felt like it was true. It felt like he'd just succinctly narrated the entirety of my relationship with Leon. 'I think I need some air,' I croaked, standing up. Riku stood up and put his hand on my arm.

'Would you like me to come with you?' he asked, as if we weren't in the middle of class.

'Yes please.'

And I think Ms. Founder must have seen how pale I looked, how concerned Riku was, and assumed it was something to do with my parents' divorce or something else major, because she just let us go. Riku put his arm around my shoulders once we were in the hall and led me outside into the watery October sunshine like I was an invalid or had just had a major shock, rather than simply been made aware of what a sham my relationship is.

He sat me down on one of the benches by the soccer pitch and then sat beside me, looking at me intently. 'Cheer up!' he announced suddenly, and I looked at him in surprise. 'Did it work?' he asked.

'Not really.'

He sighed. 'Oh well. Worth a try. I'm sorry I completed stripped down your relationship and made it sound shit.'

'That's okay. You're allowed to be cynical about relationships. Only for another few days though.'

Riku laughed. 'Fair enough. It does seem like everybody's breaking up though, doesn't it?'

'Yeah. First my parents, then you and Namine, now me and Leon…'

'We should take our lead from your dad. Spend all day in the bath singing Glee songs.'

'Xion would hate us,' I joked.

'Yeah but Kairi would love us.'

'At least Kairi's not breaking up with anybody,' I said slyly, deciding to use the situation to see if he did have any feelings for her. If he did, I'd tell her, and if not, I'd pretend like it never happened. 'Seems like she might be doing the opposite.'

Riku blinked at me. 'Getting… Married?'

I rolled my eyes. 'Getting together with somebody. There was a guy at Pride Lands who gave her his number.'

'Is that what you guys were talking about after Namine got through ripping out my heart?'

'Yeah.'

'So she's not going to call him then?'

'I'm not sure. I still have his number though,' I said, fishing it out of my pocket.

'Why do you have?'

'Well, he gave it to me. To give to her.'

Riku frowned. 'Are you sure that wasn't just a cover? He might have just wanted you to have it.'

I raised my eyebrows. 'I doubt that.'

'Why? Seems plausible to me.'

I laughed and shook my head. 'Look 'Ku, I know you probably have guys, girls, and animals giving you their number every day but that just doesn't happen to me. And anyway, he and Kairi had a moment when he was giving her candy floss. It's definitely her he's after.'

Riku's face scrunched up in an unreadable expression and he let it relax again. 'Oh. Okay. Good. I guess.'

We sat outside just talking and messing about for another few hours until it was time for lunch and we figured we'd better go back inside or the girls would come looking for us. I had just sat down beside 'Ku, across Kairi and Xion, when Kairi jumped up, frantically chewing the huge mouthful of sandwich she'd just taken, looking furious. I knew that could only mean one thing, and braced myself for hearing Leon's voice. However, instead of speaking to me, he simply grabbed me by the arm and dragged me out of the cafeteria. I looked back to see Riku and Xion both trying to hold on to Kairi, who was fighting them pretty violently to try and rescue me.

Leon pushed me into a bathroom and checked that all the stalls were empty before turning to me and leveling me with a gaze. I prepared for another fight, another round of Why He Was Right and I Was Wrong, but surprisingly his expression became penitent, pathetic even.

'Sora,' he said seriously, and clutched my arm tightly. 'Please let's not break up.'

I squinted up at him suspiciously. 'Why not?' I demanded. It seemed pretty clear that he didn't trust me.

'Look, I'm sorry. I was a pompous, arrogant asshole and I'm so sorry. I just, I spend all of my time trying so hard to be perfect and all I ever seem to do is mess things up even more. But I really don't want to break up. I mean, we're in love, we shouldn't give up on that so easily!' I nearly choked. It was the first I'd heard about us being in love.

'I hate when you do that,' I muttered, glaring at the ground.

'Do what?' he asked, confused.

'Tell me things like that. "We're in love". Who decided we were in love? We've never said it. You've never said "I love you". Why would you suddenly decide that we're in love with each other when I haven't even told you if I am or not?'

Leon looked pale. 'I… Well, um, I…'

I shook my head wearily. 'Forget it,' I said. 'It doesn't even matter. It's pretty obvious you don't trust me, and I'm sick of you trying to control me. I think maybe we should up.'

Leon grabbed my arm again, looking even more desperate than before. 'No, please Sora. Please, just give me one more chance!'

I stared at him, wondering. Kairi would kill me.

I rubbed my hand over my eyes tiredly. 'Look, just give me a few days, okay? Think of it as a break. I don't know what I want to do yet. I'll let you know soon though.'

Leon dropped my arm and nodded. 'Okay,' he said hoarsely. 'Okay. I can do that.'

He paused. 'Can I still talk to you in school though?'

I rolled my eyes. 'Yes Leon,' I said. 'You can still talk to me in school.'

I turned around to leave and just before I stepped out of the bathroom he said, 'Sora?' I stopped but didn't bother to turn around. 'I really do love you.'

I left.

**10:34pm**

So for once Kairi has decided to sleep in her own bed tonight and I am home alone with my thoughts on the one night I could really do with having her here. My brain is totally fried. I feel like if I fall asleep I'd sleep forever, yet I'm lying here in bed and I can't seem to get there. I have too many thoughts. My heart feels like it's in bits.

I have a very serious decision to make about the future of my relationship with Leon and I need to blot out all the superfluous variables. Like the fact that my mind keeps wandering back to Riku and how lovely and funny and caring and pretty he is, and how he thought it was a good thing that Candy Floss Boy didn't want me to have his number. I can't let my fledgling feelings for Riku affect this decision, because there's no point. Even if I did break up with Leon based on how I feel about 'Ku, it's not like it would end any differently. It feels like whatever avenue I take, I'll end up with heartbreak, and I'm terrified of it. The two most important boys in my life right now, and I just know that, intentionally or otherwise, they're both going to hurt me eventually.

* * *

**Well, here you go you little yaoi loving monkey sluts. ;D Anyways who do _you_ guys think is Candy Floss boy? **  
**If I get up to four reviews, I may again upload tonight. Well, adious for now.**

**_- MacabreObsession -_**

_XII . XXIX . MMXII_


	10. Chapter Ten

**Tuesday, 11th October, 2011**

So this is Kairi's reaction from when I told her about Leon and me taking a break:

**SoraIsGay**: You online?

**KairiDoom**: What else would I be doing?

**SoraIsGay**: Homework? Chores? Spending magical quality time with your family?

**KairiDoom**: Don't make me sick. What's up?

**SoraIsGay**: What makes you think anything is up?

**KairiDoom**: I feel it in my booooooooones.

**SoraIsGay**: -_-

**KairiDoom**: Cos I know you, loser. Tell me.

**SoraIsGay**: Leon and I temporarily broke up today.

**SoraIsGay**: …

**SoraIsGay**: Kairi?

**KairiDoom**: OHMIGODYOUDON'TKNOWHOWHAPPYTHISMAKESME.

**SoraIsGay**: This is why we're friends. Because you are so supportive.

**KairiDoom**: Sorry. Really. No but seriously. I've said it from the start; you can do so much better than that ass-wipe.

**SoraIsGay**: In this town?

**KairiDoom**: Well, yeah. I know it's not exactly teeming with homosexual talent, but there are some cute guys who are way nicer than Leon. Maybe no so good-looking, maybe not so smart, maybe not so nerve-rackingly perfect all the time, but they'd sure as hell treat you a way better.

**SoraIsGay**: Always assuming that any of them would even be interested in me.

**KairiDoom**: You can't let fear of being alone drive you to stay with somebody who doesn't deserve you.

**SoraIsGay**: This from the girl who will kiss anything with a penis if it shows interest in her.

**KairiDoom**: Harsh.

**SoraIsGay**: Yeah, sorry, that needed an emoticon, didn't it?

**KairiDoom**: It did. Anyway, point is I'm just having fun. You know I'm not a relationship kind of girl, don't deal well with commitment. YOU, on the other hand, thrive on it, which is why I can settle for subpar and you can't. You develop a sentimental attachment. I simply move along to the next penis-supporting organism. Like a sex-loving butterfly.

**SoraIsGay**: You should submit that to a poetry competition.

**KairiDoom**: I just copied and pasted it into my About Me section on Facebook. Watch the Friend Requests roll in!

**SoraIsGay**: I love you :)

**KairiDoom**: And I love you. Significantly more now that you're single.

**SoraIsGay**: As a penis-supporting organism?

**KairiDoom**: Oh yeah baby. Get in mah bed.

**SoraIsGay**: I'm learning some valuable lessons on how to attract men here. Please go on.

**KairiDoom**: Shut up and goodnight.

_**KairiDoom**__ has gone offline._

So it turns out I'm a commitment-aholic. That's nice to know.

What's also nice to know is that pretty much everyone had the same reaction when I told them Leon and I were on a break. My mom looked relieved and said she'd always thought he was a bit too possessive of me; my dad said he was glad I'd finally dumped the controlling bastard and now I could settle down with Kairi (denial? Should I be concerned? Is it because of the divorce? Or was it a lame attempt at humor?); Xion smiled knowingly like she'd been expecting it all along, and Riku gave me a hug and said he was proud of me (I know. It's already ingrained so deeply into my memory that I'll probably dream about it for several weeks).

But whatever. I'm gonna try not to think about it, and see how I get on living my life without a boyfriend. I've been with Leon since I was fourteen and it's time to see what I'm like as a single person, as a whole rather than a half. And my friends are being totally supportive. They've got lots of things lined up for us to do over the next couple of weeks so I keep busy and don't dwell on things. Granted one of them is taking Axel Chakram on a group date with Xion and the rest of us but I don't think being around people who are in the process of getting together will upset me too much since they're both straight and I don't fancy Axel Chakram (or Xion). Plus Riku is in pretty much exactly the same position as me so we can always just rely on each other for a depression session if it gets to be too much for us.

I love my friends.

* * *

**Saturday, 15th October, 2011**

So yesterday was the day we were supposed to take Axel Chakram on our group date.

Xion was all smiles and happy all day, 'Ku and I were mildly but not terribly depressed about the fact that we were going on a date with a guy we weren't even seeing, and Kairi was excited because she thrives on putting people in awkward situations and was practicing her snap "that's what she said" response under her breath all day.

At lunch the four of us sat at our regular table and were chatting away normally when Axel and some of his similarly attractive jock friends came to were momentarily stunned while 'Ku glared at Axel threateningly (even though Axel is bigger than him) and Xion blushed a light pink at the attention.

Axel must have noticed that 'Ku wasn't exactly warming to him, because after a few minutes he faced him and said around a bite of cheeseburger (would he go vegan for Xion's sake? Would she make him? How come I had never noticed that Xion the Vegan didn't rhymed before that very minute?), 'So, my cousin says you're in her Dance class.'

'What's her name?' 'Ku asked stiffly.

'Selphie.'

'Then yes,' he confirmed, 'I'm in her Dance class.'

There was a moment as this registered and one of Axel's friends started to snigger, but Axel elbowed him hard in the ribs and the guy went quiet. 'That's cool,' Axel said conversationally. 'She says you're good.'

I looked up with interest. Riku had mentioned on the first drive to school that he was taking Dance but I had never really thought about it. What kind of dance did he do? Tap? Ballet? Interpretive?

'I don't wear tights,' Riku said mildly, and I noticed he was looking at me with one raised eyebrow, looking slightly amused.

I shrugged. 'Pity,' I said, and he laughed.

'What kind of dance do you do, anyway?' Kairi piped up.

'Freestyle, mostly,' he said, shrugging. 'I don't deal well with guidelines and parameters.'

I grinned. 'Why am I not surprised?'

'So like Step Up?' Kairi interrupted, her eyes shining. She once had a brief yet serious crush on Channing Tatum.

'Sort of…'

'Will you show us?'

Never one to miss an opportunity to be the center of attention (not to mention doing something that might get him in trouble) Riku immediately got up and started moving like his body was made of different components to the rest of us. Popping and locking and all sorts of mad things.

We all started laughing delightedly and clapping; the rest of the cafeteria noticed and some of the other Dance students got up and joined him. It wasn't like a movie, like they spontaneously burst into synchronized dance; they were doing different things but it looked amazing. Almost simultaneously everyone in the cafeteria who wasn't dancing had their mobile phones out and was filming it, while one kid made a beat box out of his mouth and we all stamped our feet along with his beat. Then, only a few minutes after the whole thing had started and everybody was really into it and it was automatically the most fun lunch that anybody at school has ever had, the teachers arrived and restored order and monotony and made everyone sit down and the principal came and suddenly they were making a way bigger deal out of it than it needed to be.

The principal stood at the top of the room and said that the person who had started the "flash mob" (seriously?) should come forward and turn themselves in, and Riku started to stand up, but Xion grabbed him so hard by the wrist that he yelped in pain and stayed put.

After a few minutes of nobody standing up, the principal sighed like he had given us a fair shot and announced that as punishment for the actions of few, everybody would have their mobile phones confiscated for using them on school property, which is strictly prohibited. I don't know whether it's a testament to mob mentality or the fraternity between the repressed or how much everybody loves Riku after only knowing him a couple of weeks, but even though everyone complained voraciously about this unfair move, nobody gave him up. We all handed over our phones (a few people claiming that starving children in Africa have it better than us) with the understanding that our parents could collect them on Monday after school.

So we would be without our phones all weekend.

Can you imagine the chaos?

Anyway, I mention the supposed "flash mob" for two reasons. One, it was frigging awesome. And two, the fact that none of us had our phones played a large part in the proceedings of the group date.

So anyway. After school Kairi, Riku, Xion, Axel, and I all met at the main entrance and got in my car and I started driving. The plan was supposed to be open and relaxed; we were just gonna drive out to the country and have a picnic in a field somewhere. I know what you're thinking; that's totally gay. And you'd be right. And it wasn't even my idea.

Kairi sat in the front with me, and Riku sat stubbornly in the middle in the back between Xion and Axel, but Xion didn't seem to mind and Axel kept up a steady stream of chatter, apparently with himself, but which we were all invited to listen to. He's actually kind of funny and interesting. If you're into the jock thing.

Once we were significantly deep into the countryside – by which I mean sightings of sheep and the gurgle of a river nearby – I stopped the car and we all piled out and started pulling picnic baskets and blankets from the boot and went to tramp through some farmer's private property to find the river and set up our date beside it.

I'm not going to lie. It was a totally fun way to spend an afternoon. Even though it's October and not exactly picnic weather, it stayed dry and pretty mild, and once the sun started to set and it got a little cold Axel put his arm around Xion shyly and they both blushed and true to form Kairi pointed it out to make fun of them, but they didn't seem to mind. She and 'Ku and I huddled together to keep warm as well, because we were all having so much fun that none of us felt like going home.

Once it hit eight o clock and we had to squint to see one another in the gloom we admitted defeat and started packing up, making our way back to the car and commenting on our luck that some mad farmer hadn't come across us and killed or kidnapped or raped us, or tried to sew each other's mouths to each other's bums and kept us in a basement.

We piled back into the car, and this time 'Ku sat by one of the windows and let Axel and Xion sit together, and they held hands as I tried to start the car.

And tried.

And tried.

And failed.

* * *

**So, as I promised, here you go. What do you guys think will happen next? And would you guys do me a favor and vote on the poll of what pairing my next story should be about? Please and thank you.**

**Formidable Rain_: _**_I don't like snickers anyways, I'm more of a milky way type of gal. I'll upload daily. THERE! SATISFIED LADY?_

**Adious for now.**

**_- MacabreObsession. -_**

_XII . XXX . MMXII_


	11. Chapter Eleven

'Dude,' Kairi said boredly. 'That's hilarious and everything, but give it a rest, we're not fourteen.'

'I'm not kidding around,' I said, looking at her.

She looked skeptical for a moment but then must have decided I was telling the

truth, because she rolled her eyes and said, 'Well what's the problem then?' and all I could do was shrug because even though I can operate a car in the most basic sense, I have no idea how do anything more complicated than change a tire.

'I'll take a look,' Axel offered, undoing his seat belt. 'Pop the bonnet.' I did as he said and got out as well to shine the light of my phone on the engine while he checked, I don't know the oil and stuff I guess.

'Guys…' Riku's voice called from inside the car, and we turned to look; he had clambered from the back seat into the driver's seat and seemed to have located the problem. 'I think I know what's wrong.' He tapped on the dashboard. 'No fuel.'

Even from the gloom outside the car I see Kairi roll her eyes expressively again. 'Well done,' she called to me, as I willed the ground to swallow me up. I guess with all the commotion of the day, not to mention the week in general, I had forgotten fill my car up like I do every Thursday. It was surprising we'd made it as far as we did.

'Now what?' Kairi asked, getting out of the car also, and 'Ku and Xion followed suit. 'Anybody know where the nearest filling station is?'

Xion piped up, 'We're in the middle of nowhere, and it has to be miles away. And anyway I don't remember passing one on the way here.'

'We'll have to call someone,' I suggested.

'With what, genius?' Kairi demanded. 'School took our phones, remember?'

'There was a road service phone a few miles back,' Riku said, coming to my rescue. 'Why don't you guys stay here and I'll go call someone to come get us?'

'You can't go by yourself,' I interjected, 'I'll come with you.'

'Well in that case I'm coming too,' Kairi said, 'I don't want to be left alone here with those two,' she jerked her thumb at the happy couple.

Riku paused. 'Well in that case you two should go,' he said to Kairi and me, then glowered in Axel's direction even though they had been getting on okay all evening. 'Just in case,' he said ominously. I didn't think Axel was the type to try and rape anybody – he always seemed like a good guy to me, and never gave me any hassle about the gay thing like a lot of the other jocks did – but there was no point in saying that to a protective brother.

'No way,' Xion objected, 'I am not hanging out with my date and my brother all night. I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself.' All of us – even Axel – looked at her doubtfully; Xion was tough, but she had to weigh less than the wind. She sighed, rolling her eyes. 'Fine. But I am not having some testosterone-filled over-protective boy ruining my night. Kairi, you stay.'

Kairi looked like she was about to strenuously object, but Xion linked arms with her and all three of them got back into the car, Kairi with a face like thunder, while 'Ku and I tried not to laugh and resolutely made our way down the road.

'Sorry about this,' I muttered. 'I'm useless sometimes.'

'Are you kidding? For three days after Namine and I broke up I forgot to put on underwear. This is nothing.'

I tried not to think about Riku not wearing underwear but it was difficult so I swiftly changed the subject. We walked for about an hour until we reached the road service phone and Riku handed me some change so I could make the call.

'Um,' I said. 'This is kind of embarrassing. And I know it makes me a bad son. But I don't actually know my parents' numbers off by heart.'

Riku stared at me for a second, and then laughed. 'Well this awkward. Neither do I.'

Which resulted in us staring at each other.

'The only number I know off is Namine's,' he admitted. 'And even if she could be any help, we can't call her cos she's deaf,' he added bluntly.

'I know Kairi's and Leon's. But Leon's phone was confiscated too and anyway I don't want to ask him for help.'

Riku groaned and slumped down beside the phone. 'We've come all this way for nothing.'

'There is one person we could call…' I suggested timidly, putting my hand in my pocket. Riku blinked up at me. 'But I don't know if he has a car… And Kairi would kill me… Like legitimately murder me.'

'I shall protect you like the gallant knight I am,' Riku promised, putting his hand over his heart and grinning. 'Call him.'

Which was how, two hours later as we all sat in my car freezing our butts off and praying for an alien abduction, Candy floss Man pulled up in a jeep and beeped at us, grinning.

Kairi tried to make me sit up front, and I would have done it, but Candy floss Man, whose name actually turned out to be Tidus, smirkingly insisted that she sit with him there while the rest of us crowded into the back, where he had put some cushions for us to sit on. There weren't any seatbelts however, so by the time we pulled up outside the Dawn's, Axel had both arms wrapped protectively around Xion, and I had fallen into Riku about 473 times. Every time I fell against him he caught me and held me steady for a few seconds until

I'd gotten my center of gravity back while my skin tingled pleasurably under my clothes where he gripped me.

Whatever I have, I've got it bad.

Tidus jumped out and opened the back doors of the jeep to let us out, while Kairi stormed up the driveway and into the Anderson house without even waiting for Xion or Riku, or to be invited in.

'Uh…' I said intelligently, staring after her. 'Thanks, for coming to get us.'

'No problem. You sure you don't want me to drop you back with some fuel for your car?'

'No it's okay, my dad will take me in the morning,' I assured him.

'Do you want to come in for a bit?' Riku interjected, grinning and elbowing me slightly, gleeful at the opportunity to piss Kairi off even more.

'Oh, definitely,' Tidus smirked, and I knew then that he and Riku were kindred spirits. They both enjoyed getting in trouble and on people's nerves.

Xion was already leading Axel up the driveway and they stopped in front of the

door, Axel turning to say goodbye to Xion, but before he could even open his mouth she rolled her eyes and said, 'Aren't you going to come in for a while?' in a tone that made it clear there was no room for negotiation.

As a group we trooped upstairs after Kairi, who we found in Xion's room, looking shocked and then swiftly enraged that we had brought Tidus with us. He sat beside her on the bed and casually put his hand on her leg; she slapped it violently and hissed, 'As if, loser.'

I love her, I really do.

Xion lit only the fairy lights strung along her bed so the room had a sort of romantic lighting to it, making everybody's profiles more attractive and their eyes dark and sexy. We all sat on the bed in a circle, Xion and Axel becoming more and more couple-y as the night wore on, and Kairi becoming less and less annoyed every time Tidus touched her until eventually, with a sigh, she left his arm around her shoulders and told him not to get any ideas, to which he replied, 'Too late.'

'It's like we're the fifth and sixth wheel respectively,' I joked to Riku, to try and make myself feel less like a loser.

'Nonsense,' he said, 'we are a couple too, we are the best couple. We out-couple the crap out of everyone here!' And put his arm around me, making my heart go into overdrive.

This brought out the competitive sides in Axel and Kairi. Axel said efficiently,

'Oh, I beg to differ,' and tilted Xion's face towards his, who smiled beatifically up at him right before he kissed her on the lips. Nothing too gross or PDA-ish, just a soft kiss that made them both (and even Kairi and Tidus and I, though not Riku) smile happily.

Then Kairi was like, 'Sure, that's pretty couple-y, but you guys are barely touching.' And then, Tidus' legs open and sat between them, leaning back against him as he wrapped his arms around her waist and nuzzled the top of her head in happy surprise.

'That can't be couple-y,' Xion protested, 'you don't even like him.'

'Prove it,' Kairi smirked triumphantly, and kissed Tidus on the cheek.

Xion rolled her eyes and turned to her brother. 'Whatever, you've just been successfully out-coupled, times two.'

'I haven't even had my go yet!' he protested.

'Yes you did,' Kairi pointed out, 'when you started this by putting your arm Sora.'

'Yeah, well, that didn't count; you guys were all already touching. This counts though,' he said, and – I swear to god – turned to me, leaned down, and kissed me.

On the nose.

'There you go,' he said triumphantly. 'That was adorable as fuck.'

I was sitting there in complete shock at having had him so close to me, the feeling of his lips on my skin, so I barely even noticed that the others were all jeering and throwing pillows and teddy bears at us.

'You're useless,' Xion lamented. 'Give him a proper kiss, you pussy!'

'Yeah,' Kairi backed her up, 'you can't start a contest like that and then chicken out at the end!'

'Ku looked at me with a raised eyebrow, and, my heart racing, I shrugged, like

"Sure, you can kiss me, I don't mind, makes no difference to me," even though I felt like my whole body was floating at the mere prospect of it.

So Riku slipped a hand onto my neck and pulled me towards him gently and kissed me, full on lips, for two whole seconds, while fireworks exploded behind my eyes and my tummy erupted in butterflies and my skin tingled all over.

And I knew then, at that very moment, that even though it was a game to him, even though the others were cheering and throwing things at us, even though he pulled away almost as soon as he had kissed me in the first place – I knew then that getting over this guy was going to be very, very difficult. If not impossible.

* * *

**Here you go invisible cunts! Enjoy! And yes Tidus is Candy Floss man; BAM. Not at all a surpise.**

**BrokenDreamer529:** _Thank you for the apreciattion, kid-o. And yes, it hurts me having Axel straight. Hurts so much. But I needed the plot to go this way :c and if I got AkuRoku on this, they would have taken over._  
**Anaghia-san**: _Thanks for the read. :)_  
**Formidable Rain**: _Um, a suckish school in Destiny Islands. xD And thank you, you very special reviewr youuu. Eh I like satisfiying my readers, plus I don't really have a life so I write my lonliness out... Plus, I know how it feels having read something and then they don't ever upload, so I'll upload to you'll tired of me._  
**SilverWingedRaven**: _DUN DUN DUN, y'all._

**Adious for now.**

_**- MacabreObsession. -**_

_XII . XXXI . MMXII_


	12. Chapter Twelve

Riku gave me a weird look when he pulled away, sort of squinting at me and scrunching up his face slightly and I swallowed nervously; had he felt that I was way more into than him? Had I tried to kiss him properly without realizing it, just because it felt so right? And it felt so right. His lips were so soft and smooth and natural, not like Leon's, who uses (too much) chap stick, or like some of the other guys I've kissed, who almost all had chapped lips from biting and kissed too roughly.

I quickly averted my gaze and wondered if I should leave straight away, but I knew that would look seriously suspicious to everyone, so I just laughed awkwardly and avoided touching or looking at him for the rest of the night. At one point I caught Kairi's gaze and she raised her eyebrows sceptically at me like "you're being an idiot" before winking and smirking at me. I almost dreaded going home because I knew she was going to insist on coming with me, which she did, after leaving Tidus standing at the door of his jeep expectantly. Normally I would have teased her and given her shit about leading him on all night and then leaving him hanging, but I desperately bargained with myself that if I left her alone she'd leave me alone too.

Obviously that was just wishful thinking. We had to walk all the way across town to my dad's, since it was the weekend, and she left me in peace for the walk, chatting amiably about Axel and Xion, and telling me I was an idiot about my car, and offering to come with me tomorrow when I went with my dad to pick it up.

I was almost – almost – lulled into a false sense of security but I know her too well and sure enough as soon as we were settled in my room with a mug of hot chocolate each and changed into our pyjamas (well. I was in my pyjamas. She was wearing a t-shirt of mine and her underwear) and leaning against the pillows she turned to me slyly and said, 'So what was it like?'

I considered playing dumb but I knew she knew I knew what she was talking about so I figured I may as well just go with it. 'Not gonna lie,' I said resignedly, 'it was pretty amazing.'

'Tell me everything.'

So even though I felt like a total girl I told her about how soft his lips are and how warm his hand was on my neck and how fireworks went off behind my eyelids. Kairi squealed and fell against me excitedly.

'You are so lucky, you shit,' she told me affectionately, squeezing me.

'Yeah,' I agreed glumly.

'What's wrong?'

'Nothing.' I gave her my patented counterfeit grin that I developed over the last year while my parents were constantly yelling and such.

'Lies. Tell me.'

I shrugged helplessly. 'Well, you know.'

'You have a crush on him.'

I blushed. 'Is it that obvious?'

'Babe, you're nowhere near as obvious as I am, and if he hasn't noticed mine then he definitely hasn't noticed yours. It's just, for one thing, I know you, and for another, even if you were a complete stranger, you'd have to be mad not to get a crush on Riku. He's gorgeous and he's lovely, and he's totally cool. He's the trifecta.'

'Exactly,' I agreed emphatically. 'And if I wasn't falling for him before then I definitely am now and it's all pointless because he's straight as an arrow.'

'Hmm,' Kairi murmured, laying her head against mine, and for the first time in our lives she wasn't able to say anything to make me feel better because we both knew it was true.

'Tell me about Tidus then,' I eventually changed the subject.

'What about him?'

'Do you like him?'

'No. He's a prize idiot. He'd win prizes for his idiocy.'

'We were lucky he came to get us today you know, you might try being nicer to him!'

'Nicer! If I was any nicer I'd have been dry humping him on Xion's bed.'

'The fact that you associate niceness with sexuality is worrying, Kairi,' I told her sternly.

'Whatever. He is so not getting in my pants it is ridiculous. No point raising his hopes.'

'I think you might have made a mistake when you sat in his lap, then. Anyway he's totally hot, why won't you give him a chance? Do you still like Riku or something?'

Kairi pondered this. 'Well I still think he's smoking hot, obviously. But something about seeing a guy making out with your guy best friend puts you off him a bit.'

'Sorry.'

'No, it's definitely for the best. I couldn't handle the pressure of fancying him for much longer. Serious inferiority complex was materializing.'

'I think you should give Tidus a chance then. He's just like Riku, they both like getting in trouble and pissing people off, and this guy is into you.'

'And he looks like a vampire.'

I had to agree this was an accurate assertion of his silver hair and eyes and stunning paleness.

'Did you give him your number or anything?'

'Of course not. If he wants it badly enough he'll get his hands on it somehow.'

'I think you might be taking Xion's advice a little too seriously,' I confided. 'She at least gave Axel a chance in the end.'

'Yes, but my little gay friend, you are forgetting that she actually likes Axel. I want Tidus to go die in a hole.' I was about to protest that he hadn't actually done anything wrong, but she rolled over, announced she was going to sleep, and promptly went there. Then when I woke up this morning she was already humming in the tiny kitchen making toast and fried eggs for breakfast, so I just smiled to myself – Kairi only hums when she has reason to be really happy, and she never cooks – and didn't say anything.

* * *

**Monday, 17th October, 2011**

When I walked out of my dad's apartment building this morning there was a car I recognized idling in the car-park, which I presumed was waiting for me. Nervously, I walked past my own car and up to the passenger side, getting in without knocking or asking.

'Hey,' Leon said, smiling, but I could tell he was nervous. 'How was your weekend?'

Which was a question of such magnitude that I couldn't even begin to try to answer it, so I just shrugged and shook my head. 'Fine,' I managed, 'what about yours?'

'Good, actually. I did a lot of thinking. That's why I'm here. Can I drive you to school?'

'I'm in the car, aren't I?'

Leon grinned and put the car into drive, pulling out of the parking lot onto the road.

'So, I couldn't concentrate on anything over the weekend. I had to cancel my violin lessons with the kids and I didn't even get any homework done. I couldn't stop thinking about you.'

'Sorry,' I muttered awkwardly, even though it wasn't my fault.

'It's not your fault,' Leon said, and I was surprised, wondering who he would attribute blame to now, since Leon never blames himself for anything. 'It was me.' I was genuinely shocked. 'I was thinking about everything you said last week in the bathroom, about how I just decide things for us and don't consult you and basically, Sora, I'm controlling.'

I didn't bother saying that I could have told him that – that anybody could have told him that – because I didn't want to ruin the moment. Plus it was pretty remarkable that he had arrived at this conclusion by himself, and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little proud of him.

'I've been a complete jerk to you and the worst thing is that I didn't even realise I was doing it. I was thinking about two years ago, when we first started getting together… Usually when I think about that time I just remember how happy I was and how you made my tummy flip over whenever I saw you.'

I couldn't help but smile at this. Leon had never told me that was how I'd made him feel. In fact, I'd been completely unsure of his feelings for me in the beginning stages of our relationship and was constantly nervous that I was going to put a foot wrong because he was two years older than me and when you're fourteen two years is a lot.

'But I never thought about how I'd made you feel back then and when I started thinking about it this weekend, Jesus, Sora, I don't even know why you got together with me in the first place. I guess because I didn't even give you a choice. I was always bossing you around, telling you where to meet me and when and never asking if it was even convenient for you, and then after a few weeks of that I just started introducing you to people as my boyfriend without even asking you if you wanted to be!' I shrugged; this was all true. But I'd been a very nervous, very confused kid back then. I'd only just come out to people and I was terrified of going through it by myself; even though a small, deeply buried part of me knew I was uncomfortable with how things were going, I was way more scared of being without him. He was so confident and self-assured and comfortable with who he was that I thought, this is it, this is what I need to get through this.

'And then, I don't know, I guess I was so used to treating you like that and you not complaining about it that I just continued doing it. I never even realised how much you hated it.'

I shifted uncomfortably. 'I guess I could have mentioned it sooner,' I admitted.

'Yeah, you could have,' Leon said, but he didn't seem accusatory. 'But I shouldn't have been doing it in the first place.'

I put my hand out and rested it over his on the gear shift. 'I'm really proud of you Leon,' I said softly him. Despite how controlling he was, he'd never hidden parts of himself from me, I knew him and I knew how hard that would have been for him to admit. 'I know that wasn't easy.'

Leon glanced at our hands and gave me a fleeting smile. 'A few weeks of discomfort isn't much compared to two years of being trapped in a cage of a relationship,' he said.

I frowned; that wasn't exactly accurate. 'That's not how I felt,' I told him. 'I was scared, sure, but I wouldn't have stayed if I didn't like you, if you didn't make me feel safe.'

Leon looked at me, his eyes wide. 'You were scared of me?' he demanded.

I shook my head, back-tracking. 'No, that's not what I meant, I wasn't scared of you,' I assured him. 'I was scared of being alone and what would happen if I came out without you as a support system. I really don't think I could have gone through that without you Leon, you were amazing.'

'But you never even talked to me about that. I was actually kind of jealous, I thought you were fine with it when it had been so difficult for me.'

I shrugged. 'I didn't need to talk about it. You always said the right thing without my even needing to ask.'

Silently, he pulled the car to a stop and I realised we were in the parking lot at school. He turned off the car and we both sat there, staring straight ahead for a few seconds.

'Bunk off with me,' I said suddenly.

Leon looked at me, surprised. 'What?'

'Bunk off with me. We still have loads to talk about and we're on a roll.'

Leon shifted uncomfortably. 'Um. Would you not just rather come over after school? I have a test today and…' he trailed off as I put my hand on his again.

'Bunk off with me,' I said again, looking into his eyes intently. 'Come on.'

Leon's eyes searched mine for a second, then he smiled and shrugged helplessly. 'Okay. But you are forging my sick note if I get in trouble for that test.'

* * *

**I know all your little red perky butts must be raging because you all hate Leon. But as a wise man one said, "Don't hate me 'cus you ain't me." And I also know that some of you little perverts were all extacting when you heard bunk, it does not mean wanking or masterbation, is skipping, you perverts you. And sorry about gramar errors, I all this at two in the morning. And well.. This is when I have a bunch of emotions swirling in my body and I can't thing right but, eh, whatever.**

**Adious for now.**

_**- MacabreObsession. -**_

_XIII . I . MMXII_


	13. Chapter Thirteen

We didn't go anywhere special, just a park on the other side of town where we knew we couldn't get caught by anybody who would get us in trouble for skipping. We spent the whole day just hanging out and talking, and when we got bored of that we went to the swings and stood by them until the kids playing on them got intimidated and ran off, and then I sat on one and Leon pushed me for a while and it was actually pretty nice. I'm not sure if it was romantic, necessarily, cus I wasn't overcome with any urges to kiss him or jump on him like I sometimes am when he's being particularly nice to me, but I did enjoy myself.

He dropped me off at home – Mom home – at four, when I would usually have gotten back from school, and kissed me on the cheek before I got out of the car. Feeling significantly less shit about my life, I walked up the driveway and had barely closed the door behind me when there was a knock on it.

'I can't believe you bunked off without me,' Riku complained, walking past me into the house and flopping dejectedly onto the couch. Nervously, I sat next to him. I hadn't spoken to him since our kiss and I wasn't sure how he felt about it. He'd acted fine all night but I couldn't get his confused look out of my head from right afterwards. 'School was so boring without you.'

He was really going to have to stop saying things like that if I was ever going to get over him; they sent my heart haywire with expectation and hope.

'Sorry,' I mumbled, not sure what to say since the words "Please kiss me again, I might die if you don't" were trying to tumble out between my lips.

'Kairi's probably going to be over later with a hatchet,' he commented, glancing at me out of the corner of his eye. 'She's been ringing you all day.' He started picking at a loose thread on his grey long-sleeved t-shirt. 'She thinks you were with Leon.'

'Oh,' I said. Monosyllables were the order of the day, then.

'Were you?'

'Um. Yeah.' I was distracted by his fidgeting. He never usually fidgets. Also, it's depressing that I know that about him. 'We had some stuff to talk about.'

'Oh. Are you guys… Back together?'

I shrugged. 'No. I don't think so.'

'He didn't just tell you to get back together with him then?' I glanced at him, surprised. 'Sorry,' he said, shaking his head and sitting up straighter. 'That was out of line.'

'No, it's okay.' He could have called my mother a prostitute and I probably wouldn't have minded. 'He didn't. He actually apologized for being so controlling. He didn't realize he was doing it, apparently. He's going to try to change.'

'Oh. Well. That's good.'

'Yeah. But I haven't forgotten what you said, in French. About being scared to not be with him. And Kairi says I'm some sort of commitment-aholic or something, so I've got my second opinion,' I joked. 'I'm not gonna get back with him just because he knows he's been a douche. He kind of needs to prove that he's going to change before I trust him again.'

'Ku smiled broadly. 'Good,' he said definitively. The he paused, as if something had occurred to him. 'Does that mean you think you'll definitely get back with him though?'

I bit my lip. Like Leon realizing he was controlling and him actually doing something about it were completely different, my realizing that I'm scared to be alone and changing that were different too. I was still scared to be alone. 'I don't know,' I said honestly. 'Two years is a lot to throw away. I know I'm not going back to what we had before, but…' I shrugged. In my experience straight guys aren't too great with dealing with gay guys' emotions and fears.

Kairi is much better with that stuff.

'But what?' Riku pressed. I shrugged helplessly and he rolled his eyes, 'Tell me.'

'Leon's the only boyfriend I've ever had. No other guy has ever been remotely interested in me. What if I break up with him for good and I never find anybody else? What if Leon is it for me and I ruin it?'

Riku was staring at me, and then slowly shook his head. I was worried that he was disgusted with me for being such a girl and that he was just going to tell me to strap on a pair and walk out, but that was a stupid thing to think because of course Riku is the trifecta; he's lovely.

'You are an idiot,' he told me, looking me straight in the eyes, 'if you think nobody else will ever be interested in you. We live in a small town with a tiny population of LGBT people – I looked it up – and taking age bracket and stuff into account it's not shocking that you haven't met anybody else that likes you because you haven't even met that many gay guys. But you're totally amazing. You're one of the best friends I've ever had and I haven't even known you for that long; you're kind and supportive and you're really, really funny when you're moody.' This was news to me. 'And I never really took it seriously when you went on about me being better looking than you-' oh god, how often had I said it? '-but I'm starting to think that maybe you meant it and it's complete bollocks, Sora. I know I'm good-looking, I'm not gonna lie about that, but so are you.'

He paused and I could tell he was uncomfortable, which was fair enough. I knew guys found it awkward complimenting each other under regular circumstances; it had to be even weirder when a straight guy was trying to tell a gay guy he was attractive. Probably would have been even worse if he knew how I actually felt about him, and that my heart was in my throat and my lips were tingling with the longing to kiss him right now.

'Okay this is gonna sound weird,' he said eventually, 'but I'm gonna say it anyway; you're totally beautiful. You just are.' He blushed. 'And the last thing I want one of my best friends doing is settling for a guy who in the first place doesn't treat him very well, and in the second who he doesn't really love anyway, just because he thinks he can't do any better. Because you can, and you will.'

I stared at him, completely speechless.

He slumped back against the couch. 'Sorry, I completely messed that up, didn't I? I'm not used to reassuring guys; I think I'm better with girls. It was weird wasn't? I guess "beautiful" isn't a good word to use with a guy. I should have thought more about this before I said it. Can try again? Or should I just-'

He shut up as I threw myself at him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him tight and after a second his arms slid around my waist as he hugged me back and rested his head on my shoulder. After it became clear I wasn't going to let go any time soon he settled into me and we just sat there hugging for ages until the door crashed open and we jumped away from each other in surprise.

'You!' Kairi shouted, pointing at me. 'Where the hell have you been all day?'

'Um. I was-'

'You were with him weren't you?' she hissed, narrowing her eyes, making it clear who the _him_ she referred to was.

'Well, yeah. He came to take me to school and we ended up talking and-'

'I thought you liked-' she cut herself off abruptly as she finally clocked Riku sitting beside me on the couch. 'Someone else now,' she finished lamely, and Riku looked at me interestedly.

'We still needed to talk about stuff,' I said awkwardly, hoping he wouldn't, but of course he did.

'Who do you like now?' he asked curiously.

'Nobody you need to worry about,' I muttered, hoping he'd drop it.

'It's me, isn't it? It's me. I am irresistible to man, woman, and beast,' he said, crossing his arms smugly.

I don't know how I managed to keep my composure when I felt like running out of the room and locking myself in mine for the rest of all eternity, but instead I managed to say calmly,

'Sure 'Ku. That kiss the other day drove me wild with lust. I can barely keep my hands off you.'

'Ku scowled and rolled his eyes. 'Whatever. Come on, tell me.'

I glanced at Kairi, hoping she'd change the subject, but she must have misinterpreted my silent plea, because she brightened at once with her stroke of genius and said, 'It's Tidus! He likes Tidus now.'

I nearly threw the clock at her.

Riku scrunched up his nose. 'Really? Total party foul dude, I think he's pretty much Kairi's.'

'I don't want him,' she interjected quickly. 'Just want to make that clear.'

Riku shrugged. 'Well. Good luck, I guess. If anybody can bring the gay out in him it'll be you.' He stood up and stretched. 'Anyway, I better go. I got homework to pretend to do.'

'Thanks,' I said sarcastically to Kairi once he was gone. 'Now he thinks I'm a dickhead.'

'Sorry. Is that better or worse than him thinking – knowing – that you want his D?'

'Shut up,' I groaned, throwing a couch cushion at her, which she dodged easily.

My mom got home from work at half six and the three of us sat down to dinner, Kairi being a lot more pleasant than she usually was. I guess she was starting to forgive my parents for splitting up.

'So how was school?' my mom asked conversationally, tucking into her lasagna.

'Would have been better if Sora had bothered to show up,' Kairi muttered. My mom looked up sharply. 'You skipped?'

'Yup,' I said proudly.

'What did you do?'

'I was with Leon.'

She narrowed her eyes. 'Did you-'

'No mom,' I groaned. I don't think my mom is so much worried about me having sex as she is that I'll have sex with Leon. 'We just talked.'

'Oh. Well, don't make a habit of it. Should I ground you or something?'

I glanced at Kairi. 'Nah,' she said. 'I'll keep him in line.'

Like I said before, my parents are pretty laid back, and have been even more so since the divorce, thinking that it's inevitable that I'll go completely off the rails but am ultimately a good kid. Since I haven't gone off the rails and very occasionally act out, they aren't really bothered that much when I do. Plus they've always been worried that I'm so scared of authority that I won't be a well-rounded human being when I finish school. This is the first time I've ever skipped; secretly I think she'll ring my dad once I'm asleep and they'll be relieved.

After dinner Kairi and I went to my room and sat silently in my bed on our laptops, sometimes messaging each other links if we found anything interesting. I know this is supposed to be a sign of laziness in today's generation and the impending Armageddon, but I won't apologize for it. I'm a 21st century kid; this is just how we communicate now.

When I logged into MSN Xion messaged me and my heart jumped into my throat.

**XiTime**: I SAW YOU!

**SoraIsGay**: Doing what?

**XiTime**: Dude you really need to change your username, I'm sure Kairi won't be offended.

**SoraIsGay**: It's growing on me. What did you see me doing?

**XiTime**: Totally kissing Leon in his car this evening!

**SoraIsGay**: I didn't! He just kissed me on the cheek.

**XiTime**: Mmmmmhmm.

**SoraIsGay**: Seriously!

**XiTime**: Are you gonna get back together with him?

**SoraIsGay**: You mean you and 'Ku and Kairi haven't been electronically discussing this since this evening?

**XiTime**: No, we have. Just thought you'd get suspicious if I didn't ask.

**SoraIsGay**: #fail

**XiTime**: Totally enjoying this bromance between you and my brother, btw. Sounds like it was totally cute the way he was trying to reassure you.

**SoraIsGay**: -_- I can't believe he told you.

**XiTime**: Yeah, #mort for you. Don't worry; I threatened him with brute force if he didn't when he came home all distracted and worried.

**XiTime**: And by brute force I mean I threatened to have sex with Axel and tell him all about it.

**SoraIsGay**: You're wonderful.

**XiTime**: Noted. Gotta go, I'm gonna have video-chat sex with Axel.

**SoraIsGay**: Vile woman.

**XiTime**: Boys are funny.

_**XiTime**__ is offline._

Why is my love life so interesting to everyone when Xion's and Kairi's are both more interesting than mine? Tidus added me as a friend on Facebook and he's already changed his relationship status to in a relationship with her. She keeps declining the request but he keeps resubmitting it.

I am merely caught up in an unrequited love triangle.

* * *

**Yeah, I got bored of uploading everyday. It was making you guys lazy with reviews. So I will wait 'till an amount of reviews until I upload. I am not telling the number thou. He he.**

**Adious for now.**

_**- MacabreObsession. -**_

_XIII . XII . MMXII_


	14. Chapter Fourteen

**Friday, 21st October, 2011**

So today was interesting.

I should have gone over to my dad's after school but Ryan had bunked off and Xion asked Kairi and me to go over to hers, which I couldn't refuse because there was a significant part of me that desperately wanted to see him.

Despite her protestations that she hates Tidus (though god knows why, she has no reason to), Kairi has completely backed off Riku in light of my revelation that I too am crushing on him big time, and even though I still think she totally put her foot in it when she told him I like Tidus (why? WHY?), she's being totally supportive of what she calls my "play" for him. I tell her that I can't make a play for him because it would ruin the friendship (which, miraculously, he seems to really value) and also because of his affliction of heterosexuality.

Despite this, as I drove her and Xion back to the Dawn's place after school, she very casually asked Xion what I have been dying to know all day, 'so where was 'Ku today anyway?'

Xion rolled her eyes so expressively that I caught it in the rear-view and said,

'Oh he's totally PMS-ing. I've never seen him so moody.'

'What's wrong?' Kairi asked, alarmed.

'I don't know. He won't tell me. Which is weird, because he usually tells me things I don't even want to know, but I've asked him like three times this week and he won't say a word. He just grumbles incoherently.'

'We should get him some ice cream,' Kairi said decisively. 'Pull over Sora.' Normally I would have ignored her but it actually did seem like a good idea, so I pulled into the next service station and we all piled out to get him some treats.

'Which is his favorite?' Kairi asked, directing the question at Xion, but I answered absently before I could stop myself.

'He likes Ben and Jerry's Chocolate Fudge Brownie,' I said, not even looking at them as I scanned the freezer display for it. I didn't miss them smirking at each other though, which I chose to ignore.

'Sounds good. Let's get one each,' Kairi suggested, mercifully deciding not to torture me by teasing me about how I knew that.

There was no sign of 'Ku when we got back so we put his ice cream in the freezer and took ours up to Xion's room, and just hung out for a while, having a really good time despite the absence of the life of the party.

'Who are you texting?' Xion demanded of Kairi's after an hour or so, when we were collapsed in ice cream comas on her bed, our Ben and Jerry's melting in their pots on her bedside table.

'Nobody,' Kairi said archly, snapping her phone closed and putting it back in her pocket. 'But on a completely unrelated note, don't be surprised if Tidus turns up here in about twenty minutes.' Xion and I glanced at each other and snorted.

'You are so into him,' she said, rolling her eyes. 'Why don't you just admit it?'

'I'm not,' she said archly. 'He has a car and a job, that's where my interest ends. Besides,' she continued, grinning, 'Sora has dibs on him now, remember?'

Both of them collapsed into a flurry of giggles while I died, once again, of mortification. Kairi hadn't told Xion that I had a crush on her brother (though it was probably safe to assume that she had arrived at that conclusion herself anyway) but she had mentioned her bout of Tourette's where she'd told Riku that I was crushing on Tidus. She said it was because 'Ku was getting worked up about my supposed "getting back together" with Leon, and that that was why she'd felt the need to lie about the new love interest in my life, which I guess wasn't the worst lie in the world but it was pretty transparent. Still, if Xion did know about my thing for Riku, she wasn't saying anything, for which I am eternally grateful.

'Tidus' coming over?' a voice asked quietly from the doorway, and we all turned to see Riku standing there, looking kind of uncertain and run-down.

'Yeah…' Xion said, slipping off the bed and walking towards him. 'Are you okay? We got you some ice-cream…'

Riku seemed to be barely paying attention to her. 'To see Sora?' he asked instead, frowning in a sort of confused way.

'Yup,' Kairi jumped in before I could say anything, obviously thinking she was helping but just embarrassing me further. 'They've been getting along really well all week. I think Tidus likes him.' I'm not a particularly violent person, but I had to strangle the urge to punch her in her face just then.

'Oh,' 'Ku said quietly, looking down, then back up again, a beatific smile spreading across his face. 'Okay. What's this about ice cream?'

Xion frowned at him suspiciously but shrugged it off, saying we'd put his pint of Ben and Jerry's in the freezer. He left and returned moments later, smiling. 'Chocolate Fudge Brownie,' he said happily, sitting on the bed. 'My favorite.'

'Yeah, Sora was all over that,' Xion pointed out dryly, and 'Ku looked at me, something unreadable in his eyes. It was making me excited and uncomfortable all at the same time.

Ever since I'd met him I felt like 'Ku had some secret way of looking at the world, like he was laughing at jokes the rest of us weren't getting. But this was different. It was more serious. Whatever he was tuning into now wasn't funny, and I hoped it wasn't the fact that I'm falling in love with him, because that would be mortifying.

Xion's phone beeped before I could say anything and she glanced at it for a few moments before grinning broadly. 'Axel's coming over,' she said happily, leaning back against her pillows.

'What about you Kairi?' Riku asked, glancing at her over his shoulder. 'You got a hot date as well?'

Kairi looked surprised. 'Um. No,' she mumbled, even though the rest of us knew Tidus was coming over to see her. 'What about you?' she asked, swiftly changing the subject.

Riku smiled wryly. 'I think I will be single for a while,' he pointed out.

We hung out in Xion's room, waiting for everyone else to get there, and Kairi texted me to say that she had texted Tidus to act like he was into me to trick Riku. I felt sorry for Tidus that he was getting dragged into this, but I felt even sorrier for me. Tidus got there twenty minutes after Kairi had said he would, and he let himself in, climbing the stairs and coming to Xion's room, automatically making for Kairi but switching course to me when he caught her look.

'Hey Sora,' he said, and hugged me awkwardly while I died a thousand deaths of shame.

'Hey,' I muttered, feeling Riku's inquisitive gaze burning into the back of my head. Soon afterwards Axel arrived with four of his jock friends in tow, and I recognized with dread one of my main homophobic offenders, Xigbar, as he walked into the room. Xigbar steadfastly ignored me, but Kairi tried instantly to throw herself off the bed and attack him, Tidus calmly catching her around the waist and sitting her back down beside him.

I've never been very heavily picked on for being gay, but I haven't had it easy either. There are the usual backhanded comments about being a "cock-jockey" or a "fudge-packer", but Xigbar had stepped it up a notch, slamming me into lockers "accidentally" as he passed, tripping me, and knocking things out of my hands because of the sheer hilarity of it all. It was worst when I first came out and he hasn't really done anything recently, but the memory of the feeling of my stomach turning over in dread every time I saw him in the hallways stung sharp and I made a point to put as many people as possible between him and me on the bed.

I ended up squeezed next to Riku with our backs pressed against the board at the bottom of the bed, while Axel and his friends gravitated towards the top with Xion. Kairi and Tidus were arguing, as usual, in the middle. Xigbar was sitting beside Tidus, who was the only thing between him and a swift beating from my best friend on his other side. Tidus got drawn into the jocks' conversation, which I think was about cars, but I can't be certain because as I've said, all I know about cars is how to drive one.

Anyway, the discussion was getting pretty heated, with Tidus and Axel arguing one side of the debate, and the four other guys taking the opposite stance, and Riku leaned over and whispered to me, 'That's nice. Your boyfriend and my sister's boyfriend getting along.' I glanced over and he was looking at me sardonically, but before I could say anything he had returned his attention to the conversation and seemed to be pretty invested in it.

After a while Axel and Tidus broke off to have their own conversation about engines, and Tidus unwisely switched places with Xigbar so he could sit nearer to Axel and they wouldn't have to shout over any heads. Kairi's face was pinched with the urge to not snap and smack the guy, especially when he started getting a bit handsy with her.

'Dude,' I said warningly, since Tidus didn't seem to have noticed, and I shook my head when Xigbar looked up at me. He held his hands up to display his innocence and left her alone for a bit, Kairi shooting me a grateful smile.

Tidus must have said something interesting about his engine, because Axel insisted on seeing it, and the two of them trooped out of the room, still talking animatedly. Riku muttered something about getting more ice cream, and crawled off the bed over me, which made my breath catch in my throat and I tried not to turn red, because if Xigbar clocked the fact that I was into Riku, he wouldn't only out me, he'd beat the crap out of me as well. Xion, Kairi and I were left to awkwardly entertain the four jocks, who we barely knew, while Xigbar took advantage of the lack of noble male presence to try again with Kairi – even though she clearly despises him. He put his hand pretty high up on her thigh and started caressing it, refusing to move even when she slapped his hand hard. She struggled to move away from him while the other jocks grinned and rolled their eyes; I think they thought it was a joke, that she wasn't really serious.

'I told you to stop that,' I said quietly, staring Xigbar down. I might be scared of what he can do to me, but I won't stand for him victimizing girls, especially girls that are my best friend.

'Why fairy? I don't see your name on her?'

This was so blatantly sexist that I was struck momentarily dumb.

'Or is it me you're interested in?' he went on, his face twisting in disgust.

'Just get your hands off her,' I said tiredly, not wanting to play the "I'm gay so I must have a thing for you" game.

'Who's gonna make me?' he asked, smirking.

I glanced at the other jocks, who were starting to look uncomfortable, but still not inclined to do anything about it. Xion looked ready to rip him a new asshole, but I knew he wouldn't have any trouble fighting her off – not that I'd be much of a challenge for him either.

I sighed and jumped off the bed. 'Go on then,' I said, looking at him. 'Rape her, right there in front of everyone, with her boyfriend just downstairs.' He hesitated; looking like the game had taken an unexpected, uncomfortable turn. 'Go on,' I urged him. 'Big man, whip out your legendary balls, let us all see what you've got, what a man you are, touching girls who wouldn't look twice at you if you paid them.'

He growled and got off the bed, squaring up to me.

'And you should hit me again while you're at it,' I commented, looking him in the eye even though he has to be a foot taller than me and weighs twice as much. 'The kid who's two years younger than you and often gets mistaken for a twelve year old, that sounds like a fair fight. Careful though, if you touch me you might catch the Gay.'

Glaring, Xigbar paused a moment to make sure I knew how angry he was, and then backed off. Xion was after getting up at this point and stood beside us, her arms crossed over her chest. 'I think you need to leave now,' she said coldly, and I swear for a second her eyes looked almost black with fury.

Xigbar's jaw twitched, but he glanced at his friends and they all shuffled slowly to their feet, muttering apologies and following him out of the room. I turned to watch them go, and was surprised to see Riku standing dumbly in the doorway, staring at me and looking shocked. He barely noticed as the jocks walked past him; I barely noticed either, it was like the world had melted away and my heart was beating erratically in my chest as we stared at each other.

Riku dropped the ice cream he'd gone to fetch and it landed on the floor, rolling away towards the corner as he strode towards me quickly, putting his hands on my face and pulling me towards him, kissing me square on the lips. My hands were on his wrists and we stayed like that for a few seconds, just standing with our lips attached, my heart thumping in my chest so loud and hard I was sure everybody else in the house must have heard it too. Then, slowly, gently, 'Ku moved his lips over mine and I swallowed, too scared to move in case it frightened him off. Or in case I woke up.

After a few seconds he pulled away and I stared at him; the room was in complete silence and his face scrunched in a sort of confused frustration. Then he shook his head with the same confused frustration, dropped his hands from my face, and left the room. Seconds later we heard the front door slam and he was gone.

I turned around and gazed at Kairi and Xion, who were wearing twin expressions of shock that I'm sure, matched my own.

'What was that?' Kairi asked after a moment, as I stumbled towards the bed and sat on it heavily.

'And how long has it been going on?' Xion added, eyebrows raised.

'It hasn't,' I said numbly. 'That's the first time…'

'Aside from when we made him kiss you last week,' Xion pointed out.

'I knew he looked at you weirdly afterwards,' Kairi interjected.

'Would explain why he's been so moody over the last week,' Xion mused.

'Thinking you were with Tidus and all.'

Kairi frowned. 'Is he bi or something?'

Xion shrugged. 'Not before today, he wasn't.'

'I think I'm gonna go home,' I said numbly.

Kairi looked at me worriedly. 'Are you sure you're okay to drive? You look kind of shook up. And I'm not surprised by the way, that looked like some kiss-' she cut herself off when Xion looked at her.

'Yeah, I'll be fine,' I whispered, and walked out of the room, out of the house, to my car, ignoring Tidus and Axel as they called out to me because honestly, I barely even heard them. I nearly crashed three times on the way to my dad's place because I was too busy reliving that kiss to pay attention to the road, and by the time I got safely to my room and locked the door it was all I could think about.

Kairi was right. It was an amazing kiss. It wasn't even that deep or that long but I can safely say I've never been kissed like that before. It took my breath away. It made my head swim; I felt like I was floating.

There's no way I'll be able to sleep tonight.

* * *

**Here you go, to satisfy your fan-girl needs. I knew you were all starving, waiting for this chapter. But this is just the appetizers my dear invisible cunts.**

**Sailor Neo Angel: **_Don't worry, I wouldn't understand my writing either. It basically means anything used to describe someone who lacks sense of life, looks dumbfounded, and has only a limited ability to learn and understand. Often excluded from society._  
**Formidable Rain: **_It's ironically true**.**_  
**SilverWingedRaven: **_Yes, yes it is. In England, and since I am planing to one day move there, might as well learn the native language, right?_  
**Sam's Escape: **_Really? I still haven't found a heterosexual couple I actually like yet, ha ha._  
**XiTime: **_Love your username._

**Adious for now.**

_**- MacabreObsession. -**_

_XIII . X . MMXII_


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